Loyalty
by lemon-sprinkles
Summary: In the dark underworld of the Yakuza, nothing is as it seems. Centered around the conflicts, forbidden loves, and bloody business of Yakuza, agents Zack and Reno, their 'father' Sephiroth deal with a mixed up Cloud in over his head. ZxC
1. Chapter 1

_Warning: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

* * *

The building towered above all of downtown, competing against the impressive skyline of Tokyo. It held a dominant, powerful stance and intimidated all those who passed by. The company was created years ago by powerful men, all with the intent to make as much money as possible. They gained power by taking from the weak, and feeding on the rich, standing by the saying 'The ends justify the means'. They did business with every shady company imaginable, and had no regrets when someone was caught in the cross fire. Everyone was expendable, easily replaceable when so many people lusted for the same power. Only those strong enough and ruthless enough were chosen to work for the company.

Cloud Strife would have it no other way.

---XX---

Standing in the elevator, Cloud kept glancing at his watch and fiddled with his tie; shooting people nasty looks when they gave him a second glance. He was late, and he was pissed. Not only had someone cancelled on him, but Yuffie had forgotten to give him some very important papers that were needed for his previous meeting.

Cloud swore under his breath when a young man came into the elevator, his crazy red hair tied back in a messy pony tail. The young man sent Cloud a small look and stood at the other end of the elevator, his hands placed in front of himself, a professional air about him despite his appearance. Cloud gripped his suitcase tighter and cracked his neck a few times, trying to work out the feeling like he was being squashed.

The elevator tinged, signaling its arrival to one of the top floors. Cloud quickly stepped out of the elevator, and walked down the long hallway. He started looking behind every so often to see if the red head was following him and groaned when he saw the man sauntering behind him at a much slower pace. Before reaching his office, Cloud looked around a few times and stopped at the door of a deserted conference room. Opening the door, Cloud stormed into the room and threw his briefcase down on the table, turning around quickly to see the red head slowly walk in and quietly shut the door.

"Mornin' Mr. Strife." The red head said, waving slightly, a cocky smile on his face.

"Cut the formalities Reno. What the fuck do you want?" Cloud spat out, standing his ground.

"You know what we want…" Reno said, walking over to one of the chairs and sitting down in it, placing his feet up on the table. "My boss was kind enough to help you out, and you go and stab him in the back."

Cloud rolled his eyes and pushed Reno's feet of the table. "I told you, the deal is off. Things didn't work out as planned."

Reno growled slightly when Cloud pushed his feet off, and cracked his knuckled a few times. "Maybe things didn't work out as planned for you, but we finished out end of the deal, which means you gotta finish yours."

Reno stood up quickly and straitened his jacket. "If you don't finish it, there will be consequences." With that he headed for the door, opening it slightly before turning back around. "And don't tell me you can handle it, because trust me… you do not want to test our patience."

Reno left the room without a second glance, leaving Cloud standing there, his face slightly pale.

Shaking is head, Cloud walked over to his suitcase and picked it up, before running a hand through his hair. He went to the door and stood there a moment, moving the handle of the briefcase in his hand, bouncing the case slightly. Gaining his composure, Cloud left the room shutting the door behind him before walking to his office, a determined glint in his eye.

"I am SO sorry," A young woman's voice could be heard from behind a stack of papers. Yuffie suddenly appeared from behind the papers, a few sticky notes stuck in her hair. "I was going to give them to you but then you left to quickly and I messaged you but you didn't check!"

Cloud gritted his teeth and watched as Yuffie ripped a few notes off of her skirt, looking up at Cloud every one in a while, worry etched on her face.

"You know I don't check my messages while I am in a meeting…" Cloud said as calmly as he could. Yuffie looked up and nodded quickly.

"I know that, just… do you know what? Screw this I've worked overtime today so I am going home." She grabbed her bag and headed out of the office her eyebrows furrowed in anger. Cloud would have fired her long ago if she wasn't the daughter of his boss.

Walking to his office, Cloud undid his tie and threw it on the coat hook. Throwing his briefcase on the leather couch, the blond went behind his desk and pulled out a small bottle of pills, taking out a few and popping them into his mouth, swallowing them. He could feel the headache of a lifetime coming on.

---XX---

"He isn't cooperating?" The silky smooth voice of a man asked, a small coin dancing between his knuckles.

Reno nodded, an annoyed expression on. "Yeah, he's being a real ass about it too."

The man hummed, the coin stopping its path along the man's hand. "And you warned him of the consequences?"

"Yeah, I did… well I didn't exactly tell him what was going to happen—"

"At least you did one thing right." The voice of another man spoke up, dangerously low. Reno shot the man a look and averted his attention back the one with the coin.

"What's your next move?"

The man placed the coin on the table and flicked it so it started to spin. "Give him a week… if we don't see any movement from him… I will get someone to deal with him." The man then reached out and slammed his hand down on the coin, stopping its spinning. Cool, green eyes looked up at Reno. "Do you understand?"

"Of course, sir." Reno replied, standing up and bowing before leaving the room.

"Are you going to let Reno deal with Strife if he doesn't reply?" The other male asked, brushing away a few long black hairs.

"No… I want to test out another member's loyalty…"

* * *

**Authors Note:** Why hello there! This is my second fanfiction, and I gotta tell you, I am very excited for it! It will take me a lot longer to post the chapters for these, because I haven't written the entire story, but I hope you guys will stick around and read the entire story! It should be a little longer then my previous fic, and a lot darkr and violent, so I warn you about that! But yes, I hope you enjoy! Oh, and this chapter goes out to **Stoic-Genius** who seems super exctied for this fic, and sent me an awesome message that made my day! Hope you enjoy it, hun!

**Also, another side note**. **Damaged-Worth** and I have fanfictions that have one small little detail that is the same in both... Zack is sent to kill Cloud. BUT, we have talked this through and realized that other then that, ours take VERY different directions in the way the story goes. So I don't want anyone freaking out saying one of us stole each others stories because there was no stealing going on! She and I just have very cool brains that make up wicked awesome ideas. So go read her story as well, and I hope you enjoy it because she's a flippen fantastic writer!


	2. Chapter 2

_Warning: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

* * *

It was early in the morning and the crows were screaming through the streets, sending shivers down those who heard. The sewer grates were steaming slightly from a cold rain that had just swept through, creating a dismal atmosphere. A neon light flickered above the raven haired man resting under it, making it hard to see his face for more then a few moments. Smoke trailed out of his mouth and hung around, spoiling the air.

Footsteps could be heard coming down the street and the raven haired male looked up quickly, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. The footsteps grew slightly louder and another man was soon visible, holding a small object.

"Happy Birthday, Zack!" Reno called, walking closer to the man under the sign. Zack immediately relaxed, his shoulders sagging slightly. He took another drag of his smoke and moved off the wall to meet Reno half way.

"You got me a present? Awe, that's so sweet of you." Zack said in a teasing tone, grabbing the red heads cheek and pinching it. Reno swatted his hands away, growling slightly.

"Yeah, yeah, don't get too excited. It's nothin' special. Just thought I would get my friend something' on his twenty-eighth birthday." He offered the gift to Zack, and stuffed his hands in his pockets, scuffing his boot on the ground slightly.

Zack took the package and opened it, a small smile gracing his lips. A set of skull and cross bone cufflinks were placed in the box catching the neon light slightly, creating an eerie feel in the hollow eyes of the skulls. "These are great!" Zack said, grabbing Reno and pulling him into a hug. "My old ones are started to get a little busted up…"

Reno pulled away and grabbed Zack's arm to take a look at the ones he was currently wearing. The sun had started to come up, and a pale blue light was cast across the streets. More people had started to come out and the streets were getting busier. There never seemed to be a dull time in Kabikucho.

"It looks like you fell down a mountain with them." Reno stated, noticing all the scuffs and dents in the small pieces of metal. He was surprised their 'father' hadn't said anything about it. He wanted all his men to look put together and intimidating.

"I did fall down a hill once after that chick threw a purse at me. I thought she seriously had a bomb in it," Zack laughed and took his arm back. "So, what are you doing up so early?"

They started to walk down the street, their shoes clicking on the cement slowly; Zack finished his smoke and threw it down on the street, not even bothering to put it out.

"I couldn't sleep. I've been dealing with a very difficult customer and have been trying to make sure he doesn't get up and split on us," Reno said, rolling his head back, trying to work out a few kinks that had developed from stress. "Stupid kid is such a smart ass."

Zack laughed slightly, and shook his head. "You think anyone who talks back to you is a smart ass."

"No, you haven't met this guy. If you ever do, you will know what I am talking about," Reno fished around in his pocket looking for a pack of smokes. "If this guy doesn't finish his end of the bargain soon, I'm definitely going to be there when someone finishes him. Hopefully it will be me." He found the pack in the pocket of his pants, but it was empty much to his dismay. Tossing it onto the cement, the red head nudged Zack hoping for a smoke.

Zack passed Reno one of his, a small smile on his face. "How come you always seem to be out when I'm around?"

Reno just shrugged and gave Zack an impish grin. "Just my luck I guess!"

They stopped at a Pachinko parlor; the sound of the machines starting up and getting ready for the day could be heard through the door. Reno lit his smoke and went to lean up against the parlor, a satisfied smile on his face. "Why are you up so early?"

Zack lent up against the building as well and starred down at his shoes. "I had to go work over at one of the… houses. We got some new girls in and I had to make sure nothing happened," He shook his head and stuffed his hands in his pant pockets. Tapping his foot on the ground a few times he gritted his teeth before speaking again. "I just hate working those joints. I mean, those two girls who came in were so young, so god damn young. They shouldn't be in that business…"

Reno shook his head and watched a few business men walk by with mild interest. "It's all part of the gig man. Besides, you gotta do some things for your family that you really don't want to do. But it's for the family. Besides, I thought you did this all the time!"

Zack snorted and ran a hand through his hair. "Yeah yeah, I know… it just… fuck I don't know. It's getting to me I guess."

Reno watched a young woman with a short skirt walk by, entranced by her bottom and how the Zebra print moved with her. When he heard Zack start to voice his doubts again, he regretfully tore his eyes away and green eyes locked with violet. Now that Reno was actually paying attention to Zack, he could see the older male had developed bags under his eyes. His hair was a little messier then usual, and his trademark grin wasn't on. "You okay, man?" Reno asked slowly, concern evident in his voice.

Zack nodded and rubbed his eyes. "Yeah just tired…"

Reno nodded, not completely convinced. Deciding to change the subject Reno moved so his shoulder was resting against the building and he was fully facing Zack. "Remember the first day I joined?"

Zack laughed and nodded. "You were such a weirdo back then… although things haven't changed much."

Reno shoved Zack's shoulder a little and glared. "I was a very put together young man, I will have you know!"

"Huh, yeah and I really thought trying to punch out Vincent when he touched your arm was a nice touch." Zack gave Reno an amused look.

"I don't trust people easily, so what! I actually think the only person I do trust in this entire world is you…" Reno lost his usual sarcasm and looked down at his shoes.

Zack didn't know how to respond, so he just ruffled Reno's hair. "That's so sweet! But you know Reno, all you had to say is that you love me, and I would have been yours in a split second!"

Reno pulled away from Zack's hand and shot the raven haired man a look. "Just because you like cock up the ass, doesn't mean I do."

Zack gave Reno an offended look, which soon turned into a feral grin. "Oh yeah, and when was the last time you got any, Mr. I get women all the time?" Zack felt like a complete idiot, talking about their sex lives in such a mocking way. It made him feel like he was nineteen again.

"I get plenty of women; I just don't talk about it often because it's not right. The fair maidens I pick up deserve more respect then that!" Reno shot back, grinning as well.

"Oh yeah, fair maidens my ass. You only call them that because they give you a cheap blowjob."

Zack soon found himself in a headlock, Reno tightening his grip around Zack's neck, fully intent on choking the life out of his companion.

The raven haired man tried to get out of his grip, flailing about while laughing. It started to hurt when he laughed, his oxygen supply being significantly cut off. Zack eventually managed to get out of Reno's hold and shoved him away, laughing. "Dude, you get so touchy sometimes, just calm down!" He laughed out, rubbing his neck.

Reno rolled his eyes and put his hands on his hips. "I don't pay for my women, dick wad!"

Zack, continuing to rub at his neck, closed his eyes for a moment and rolled his head back, trying to work out the kink that had developed. "Yeah yeah, I know. Vincent is the one who pays for the women!"

Zack started to laugh but soon stopped when he didn't hear Reno laugh. Opening his eyes he looked at Reno and raised one dark eyebrow. "What… it was a joke. I thought you of all people would enjoy it seeing as how you hate Vincent so… much…"

When Reno went a little pale, Zack knew he fucked up. Turning around slowly, he saw Vincent standing there. His suit was neatly done up, his hair hanging gracefully around his face, and his stance was that of a confident man. Vincent's face betrayed no emotion, just his usual cold and calculating look. Zack smiled a little and scratched the back of his head.

"I hate to break up the immature display, but Sephiroth wishes to speak to the both of you…" Vincent said, taking in a deep breath, trying to keep his emotions in check.

---XX---

"This is fucking bull shit and you know it." Cloud said sitting down heavily. He ran a shaking hand through his hair and sighed heavily.

When he got no reply from the man sitting in front of him he continued. "If I don't do something soon, I am in so much fucking shit it's not even funny. You know I wouldn't come and ask for help if it wasn't important."

Rude went to lean forward in his chair, his elbows resting on his knees. Looking down at the ground, Rude examined the bland, grey carpet through tinted glasses, completely fed up with the blond man currently sitting in front of him.

"How can I help you if you won't even tell me what you did…?" Rude said slowly, while looking up to examine Cloud's features. He definitely looked worried and panicked. He hadn't looked this way since his sister passed away.

Cloud hissed a little under his breath and looked away from Rude. "If I told you, things would just be worse. Listen, all I need is for you to help me get the position in the states." It was a heavy request, but Cloud knew Rude could handle it. Cloud didn't like to admit it, but Rude had more power in regards to the company then he did.

"You know I can't do that-" Rude began but was cut off when Cloud shot upwards. He headed towards the door, throwing it open.

"Just think about it…" Cloud said, not even looking back before leaving the larger mans office.

Rude leant back in his chair and took his glasses off, throwing them onto the desk. Something was wrong with Strife, and he didn't think the stubborn blond would tell him what was going on. He sighed heavily and shut his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.

---XX---

"It's relatively simple…" Sephiroth said, leaning casually back in his chair, his cold green eyes scanning the tables occupants, stopping to look at the raven haired man sitting two chairs away from him. "I expect a clean job."

Zack nodded and took the folder that Vincent passed to him. Reno tried to get a look, but was blocked when Yazoo moved forward in his chair, resting his elbows on the table.

Zack carefully opened it up and scanned through the file, reading through the information.

_Date of birth: August 19 _

_Age: Twenty Seven_

_Place of Employment: Kisaragi Corporation_

_Place of Residence: 2040 7__th__ Street, Apartment 9C_

Zack nodded and looked up at Sephiroth. "You just want him dead, right?"

Sephiroth nodded and pulled out a coin from his pocket, making it dance across his knuckles. "That is correct. I want it done quickly and efficiently. You haven't failed me in the past, and I expect the same professionalism from you."

Zack nodded and furrowed his eyebrows a little. He was confused as to why Sephiroth was putting so much emphasis on his performance in this killing. Why would it be any different then the other ones he had to carry out? Other then the fact that this guy was a little younger and much more attractive then the other fuck ups he had to dispose of.

Kadaj grabbed for the file, opening it quickly. "Oh, he's pretty hot…" He said, sticking his tongue out. "Shame you gotta blow his brains out."

Sephiroth shot his nephew a look, and flicked the coin on to the rich wooden table. Vincent went to take the folder back when Kadaj moved it out of his reach. "Cloud? This guys name is _Cloud_?"

Kadaj started to laugh, while Reno ended up pouring tea on his lap.

"The fuck?" Reno said, starring at Sephiroth in disbelief.

* * *

**Authors Note:** Reno's hit has been stolen! Oh noes! Anyways, chapter two! I wrote this one before I even posted the first chapter, but this is the last pre-written one. After this I have to write them out, correct them and then post as soon as possible. This means that the chapters will take longer to get out, so I am sorry about that! But we pretty much jump into things in this fanfiction, getting right into the action. Thanks for all the reviews and the watches and such! It means a lot to me, especially seeing as how it's only just the beginning and people are already excited to see what happens! I love you guys! And please review, I really appreciate them and they totally make my day! 


	3. Chapter 3

_Warning: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

* * *

Zack ran a hand over the jet black gun and brought it close to his face to look over the engravings on the side. He closed one eye and moved to point the gun at the wall, and faked shooting it, a smirk on his lips. 

"Think this one will do a good job?" He asked Reno, who was currently lying on his bed like a giant cat. Reno cracked an eye open and looked at the gun with a scowl.

"It wouldn't work well; you have shit aim with that one." He drawled out before closing his eye again. Zack watched the red head's mouth move around a little, and he knew Reno was grinding his teeth.

Sighing, Zack went back to his large collection of guns, running his hands along the desk they were sitting on. "Well, I have to take him out either at his home, or on his way home from work. He lives in a pretty upper class place, but it wouldn't be too hard to get in… and he usually drives home so it would be hard to get him while he's in a car…"

Zack tapped his bottom lip, and went to look outside, blinking a little when he pushed the blinds away and the afternoon sun struck his vision. He watched a few people walk by as well as the occasionally car drive by before he heard Reno talk again.

"You know, you could just let me do it for you…" Zack moved away from the window and turned around to look at Reno. Reno sat up and looked at Zack, completely serious. "I mean I was the one watching this kid, so I should be the one to take him out."

Zack shook his head and went back to his desk. Pulling the chair away from the desk, it made a loud unappealing sound as it scraped against the already scuffed up wooden floors. Sitting down heavily, Zack stretched his legs out and slunk down in the chair, looking a lot like a moody teenager. Taking a bullet in one hand, Zack started to play with it, watching the light from the small electric bulb dance off of it.

Reno watched Zack do all of this, glaring at him while grinding his teeth. Making a few upset sounds, Reno finally scooted off the bed and sat on the end to kick Zack's chair hard. Zack almost dropped the bullet, but caught it in time to throw it at Reno's head.

"What the fuck, are you eleven?" Zack asked his voice raised a little as he looked at Reno, completely baffled as to why his friend was acting like a twat.

Reno stood up and went to lean against the wall, sighing heavily. "Why do you think Sephiroth didn't let me do the job?" He asked, looking at Zack through red bangs.

Zack shrugged and bent down to pick up the bullet that had slowly rolled back over to him. "I think it's because he feels you're to involved with this Strife kid, and you would let your hatred of him get in the way of the killing. We're supposed to shoot and leave, not shoot multiple times in the chest while cackling evilly."

Reno scoffed and pushed away from the wall to go and lean against the desk. Looking down at Zack, Reno took the bullet out of the raven haired male and tossed it from hand to hand. "Do you think it's going to be easy?" He asked, grinding his teeth again.

"No, killing some high up guy is never easy, and stop grinding your teeth its bad for you."

Reno froze and looked at Zack, an eyebrow raised. "What are you my grandma now?"

Zack rolled his eyes and stood up. "Listen, I just think you should fucking calm down and stop acting like you're a little kid! So what if I got the gig, it's not like killing someone is really all that great!" He threw his hands up into the air got up from his chair.

There was silence in the room before Reno spoke again. "You're going soft… that's why Sephiroth put you up to this."

Zack whipped around and looked at Reno, in slight shock. "I have gone 'soft' because I don't find killing someone an enjoyable experience?"

Reno shrugged and went to leave the room. Stopping at the door he turned around to salute Zack. "Just be careful with this mission, okay?" He stuck his tongue out and opened the door, leaving the small apartment.

"You're fucking Bipolar, you know that?!" Zack yelled. All he received was a kick to the door.

--XX--

"Cloud, I really think you need to relax, I can almost feel the tension in your muscles and I am on the phone with you!" The voice of a woman could be heard over the small phone, her tone growing louder and higher pitched as the sentence went on.

"Aerith, I really don't have time to come down to your place." Cloud said, playing nervously with his keys. He kept looking out his window, starring down at the calm, quiet street with extreme apprehension.

"Are you sure? I can schedule you in for a quick massage tomorrow at lunch time so you don't miss any important work." Cloud could hear Aerith fiddling with a pen, and could swear he heard her mutter something about being 'stubborn.'

"Look I really don't have time for that, and I really don't have time to be talking right now." Cloud said quickly, almost jumping off of the window sill when a car drove by. God, he really needed to calm down. No one was coming for him, Reno was just lying. And if anyone was coming, Cloud could handle it no problem.

He sighed heavily and stopped playing with the keys in his hand. He instead stood up from the window sill and pocketed the silver. "Hey, I'll call you back tomorrow…" He said while flipping the phone closed.

He ran a hand through spiky locks and blinked a few times, trying to get rid of the fatigue that racked his body. Ever since Reno had visited, and as much as Cloud hated to admit it, the words that had been exchanged worried him. Going into the bathroom, blue orbs flicked up to the mirror. The light in the bathroom flickered slightly, distorting Cloud's appearance. Resting his hands on the porcelain basin, Cloud gazed at himself, scrutinizing the bags under his eyes and how weak he looked. Swearing under his breath he turned away from the mirror and flicked the light off before going into his bedroom, almost falling on some important documents.

He stared at the papers on his bed, looking at the writing under the light that came through the window. Rolling over, he closed his eyes, willing some relief to come.

--XX--

Footsteps were heard down the quiet street, the heel of a mans shoe, and then the sole. A trail of smoke followed, the ash from the cigarette falling to the ground as it was momentarily forgotten.

A sticky note stuck to the inside of a pocket, and a strong hand took the note out, skull cufflinks flashing in the streetlight. The footsteps stopped in front of an expensive apartment complex, and violet orbs flicked up to read the street number.

A small chuckle was released from the male's lips as he noticed no one was at the door, and the lobby was still alight. Walking into the lobby, he strode towards the elevator, keeping his back to the security camera. Gently pushing the button to go up, he waited patiently, swaying back and forth slightly.

The small ding could be heard and the doors slid open while he walked in, and pressed a button, going to the middle section of the complex. Again, he used patients, and scanned the elevator, keeping his back to the camera the entire time. Coming to the correct floor, he quietly walked down the hallway, scanning the door numbers.

Eyes flicked back down to the sticky note, reading over the smudged numbers written in black ink. ….6C…. 4C… 8C…

The male stopped in front of door 9C and smirked.

--XX--

Cloud found sleep overtake him, but his relief wouldn't last long. He didn't get more then two hours of sleep before he woke up and found himself unable to succumb again. He paced around his living room, tugging at his blond locks in a frustrated, almost frantic way. He wanted to fix things, and he sure as hell didn't want to feel weak like this, but coming through with his end of the bargain would threaten his career, and could completely destroy everything he worked so hard to build. A fate worse then death.

Glancing at the clock, the green glowing numbers read 2:55 AM. Sighing heavily, Cloud looked down at his clothes, noticing he was still wearing his clothes from yesterday. His shirt was un-ironed and opened, while his dress pants had the top button undone. He would have laughed at his appearance, seeing himself as some fucked up porno star if he wasn't facing his death at any moment.

But maybe he was just over reacting. Maybe no one would really come. It's not like his death wouldn't be heavily investigated it's not every day that a young, promising business man gets a bullet to the head…

Only he worked in a company that something like that wouldn't be uncommon. They all pulled shit off that would get them in major trouble, and all held their own. So why couldn't Cloud?

"Fuck this…" He growled out stopped his pacing to stand in the middle of the room. "I'll fucking handle this myself… I will just go into work today and I will go about my every day stuff. I'll fucking work this out, and get out of this shit all by myself."

He almost smashed his head into the flat screen on the wall beside him. Now he was talking to himself, which was _completely_ sane.

He was about to go to the washroom and just get ready for the day, and go into work early when he heard something. He froze and whipped his head around to look at his front door. Footsteps… he heard them loud and clear.

Swallowing heavily, the spit felt like millions of centipedes crawling down his throat, and his hands began to sweat.

'Calm down… just calm down. Some guys come home late from the bar and is just taking his time going back to the wife…' Cloud told himself, right as he began to shake slightly. 'It's nothing, just go into the washroom and get ready.'

A car drove by down on the street and Cloud could hear the tires, could hear the hum of the engine even from all the way up in his apartment. He felt like every sense had been heightened. Taking a shaky breath, he shook his head. The footsteps have disappeared. It was all in his fucked up, paranoid imagination.

Cloud took a few steps before the door suddenly swung open, blinding the blond momentarily as all the light from the hallway flooded the room. Blinking, Cloud looked into the hallway.

The clock on the wall flashed 3 AM, as violet orbs met brilliant blue.

* * *

Authors Note: Hahahaha, I did it, yo! Finished the chapter that threatened to kill me! So I wrote the first part up about two weeks ago and then everything after the convo with Reno was HELL. But while I was half asleep, and thinking about almost finishing Crisis Core (I am so close guys! Wish me luck on not breaking my PSP when I finish and started to cry!) I had a wave of inspiration and actually remembered it in the morning! In regards to the whole 3 AM thing, I read somewhere... along time ago... like, when I was in grade six, that 3 AM is the devils hour and I thought that would be cool to throw in... yah. Anyways, next update should be at some point in time... I don't wanna set a date because I won't full fill it because I suck. Reviews are love, and I love all those who have reviewed, who are reading, watching, thinking about reading and all that fun stuff! -hugs- 


	4. Chapter 4

_Warning__: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer__: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

* * *

Cloud couldn't move.

His entire body screamed at him to move some limb, to try and move out of the gaze of the man before him. He couldn't even scream if he wanted to, he was too shocked.

The man before him simply grinned; one of those grins that said 'Hey, glad you could make it to my backyard party'. Most of his face was covered by darkness, the light spilling in from the hallway having no effect on his appearance. Cloud wished he could see more of his face; he hated the fact that he wouldn't be able to see the man who would kill him.

"You should lock your door," was the first thing Zack said as he stepped farther into the room and closed it. "Nasty people could just walk in if they wanted to."

"What the fuck are you hear for?" Cloud asked quickly his voice cracking much like his brave exterior was cracking under the gaze of the man before him.

Zack sighed heavily and shook his head. "Do I really have to explain that, Cloud?" He grinned with Cloud visibly stiffened when he name was used. "What, most people call you Strife, right?"

When he didn't get a response he sighed again and slowly took his gun out. "People really shouldn't just ignore a question and not answer it. That's just plain rude."

That's when Cloud's body went into action. He suddenly dropped down on the floor and behind the couch, out of the view of Zack. Maybe he would survive for at least five more seconds before Zack walked around and shot him swiftly in the head.

"Okay, I have seen people try and get away, but never have I seen someone just drop to the ground like that!" Zack giggled slightly, and Cloud almost got back up to yell at him for acting like a child. He was an assassin god damn it, not a twelve year old.

Zack wandered over to the other side of the couch and frowned down at Cloud. "I am not going to kill you while you're down on the ground like that. You look pitiful. If you wanted I could like… shoot you up against a wall so you get the cool blood effect on the wall."

Cloud growled and stood up quickly, offended that this guy-he didn't even know his name- was sent to kill him!

"I don't plan on dying, thank you very much. Now I want you to tell me why you're fucking here so early," He hissed out, gaining a sudden bust of bravery.

Zack rolled his eyes and scratched the back of his head. "You do realize you made a deal with the Yakuza, and we don't deal with candies and puppies." As he said this he walked a little farther away and pointed the gun at Cloud. "I don't usually talk to people this long but as my fellow member was commenting on how cute you are, and I kind of have to agree. So, any last words before I finish this and go home?" He raised an eyebrow and smirked.

Cloud tapped his foot lightly and clenched and unclenched his hand as he looked around the room frantically. "Yea…FUCK!" He yelled quickly as he grabbed the vase on the table and threw it at Zack's head. He was not going down without a damn good fight, and a lot of yelling.

Zack almost didn't dodge the vase in time, and it smashed on the wall behind him, sprinkling sharp little shards in his hair and on his shoulders. There was a loud thump from upstairs and Zack swore quickly under his breath.

"Fuck, now you have drawn attention to this," He said quickly as he jammed his gun back into its holster on his side. He walked quickly to the door and opened it. "You're spunky and I like that, but don't count your luck just yet," He said before slamming the door closed and taking off and out of the apartment complex.

Cloud ran to the door and threw it open, watching Zack walk down the hallway. He was breathing heavily and shaking.

"Is everything all right?"

Cloud turned his head quickly to see his elderly neighbor out in the hallway, a nightgown wrapped tightly around her as he weather worn face gazed at him in a questioning way.

Cloud was tempted to tell her that-no nothing was alright and someone was trying to kill him and was going to continue to come and try and kill him till the job was done. But he then thought that maybe dragging an old woman into the problem (not matter how temping it was) wasn't the best idea.

He shook his head slowly and muttered something about 'lovers spat' to get her off his case.

He slammed the door closed and slid down it to rest his head between his knees. Tugging at his golden spikes absentmindedly, he tried to stop and just think things through. All the thoughts in his mind were whipping around him, preventing him from grounding himself and holding on to one, coherent thought.

But soon he grabbed on to a few thoughts and reality sunk in. He started to shake and wanted to scream. He was way in over his head and seeing that… that guy come in and try and kill him only to leave him panicked for longer? Cloud could feel what little contents he had in his stomach come up, and ran towards the bathroom. His entire body started to shake as he heaved above the clean, white bowl.

--XX—

Reno walked down the street and to the small, shabby apartment. Sauntering up the steps, he skipped the third knowing it would creak loudly. No one wanted to wake up the guys who lived in this apartment. The red head flicked his lighter open, and then closed it with another flick before he got to the door he wanted. He opened the door with a spare key he had and walked in to find a silver haired male peeking through a few drawers.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing, yo!"

Kadaj looked up quickly, a piece of paper on his hand. "Fucking doing my job, what does it look like?"

Reno scowled and walked forward to rip the paper from Kadaj's hand. "I don't think stealing Zack's shit and looking through it constitutes as doing your job."

"Well right now it does, so fuck off! What the hell are you doing in Fair's apartment anyways?" He tried to grab the piece of paper back from Reno but the red head was too quick and dodged out of the way.

"'m always here, and besides I thought I would check things out and see how the hit went."

Kadaj stopped grabbing for the paper and looked Reno over. "So he went for it tonight? My uncle will be pleased."

Reno rolled his eyes and was tempted to stuff the piece of paper in Kadaj's mouth, but decided not to. "Yeah yeah, Sephiroth will be really pleased… hey, why is this subscription to Time magazine important?" He asked as he read over the slip of paper.

Kadaj shrugged and went to leave. "I was snooping and that happened to be in my hand at the time you walked in,"

Reno walked forward and slammed his arm in front of Kadaj as they went into the small hallway leading to the door. "What do you mean by 'snooping'? Why is Zack the target this time?"

Kadaj grinned and looked at Reno with one eye, his other covered by his silver bangs. "Because someone's losing the trust of everyone…"

Reno furrowed his eyebrows and looked at Kadaj. "What do you mean he's losing the trust of everyone?"

"Awe come on… tell me you haven't been questioning Zack lately? He's been going off on his own every once in a while, looking restless and talking about doing other things then working for the family. Uncle only gave him this hit to see if he would do it quickly and efficiently like he always used to. If he doesn't, something's definitely off." He winked. "Just like when you kept running off to see your mo-"

Reno grabbed Kadaj's shirt collar and slammed him against the wall hard. "How the fuck did you hear about that?" He got close to Kadaj and stared the silver haired teen down. "You have only been in the circle for a little while."

"Yeah and I grew up in the family, I fucking heard things, alright?" he pushed Reno back and grabbed at his neck, glaring at the red headed male before him.

Reno was tempted to punch Kadaj but figured things would just be worse if he did. "Get the fuck out of here, yo…"

Kadaj smirked and went to open the door. "Just remember the things I told you about Zack. I know you have been noticing it too; you just don't want to admit it because you love him. He can do no wrong in your books. Too bad he doesn't know how willing you would be to bend over for him."

Reno was going to rip the teen's throat out when Zack appeared in the doorway, his hair looking silver in the light.

"What the hell are you doing here?" He asked Kadaj, pushing him out of the way to storm into the apartment.

"I was just on my way out… and Reno, when you ask him how it went… just remember what I told you." Kadaj laughed slightly and left the apartment, shutting the door behind him.

Reno looked at the closed door for a moment before turning around carefully to look at Zack. Zack was shrugged his jacket off and threw it violently to the floor. "Fuck that was a waste of time."

Reno laughed nervously and walked back into the apartment. "Yo, what happened… did you kill him?"

_Please say yes, please say yes! _

"No, I couldn't," He shook his head and little glass shards came out, making Zack growl even more. "I tried to but he made so much noise people in the complex started to get up and they were going check on us."

Reno nodded and sat down on the bed, watching Zack unclip his gun holster. "That was it… like that's the only reason why you didn't take him out? Didn't have enough time or something, yo?"

Zack paused and looked at Reno and then at the floor. "Well… well I did. It was weird but I talked to him for a bit… like, I tried to make the situation better for him. I don't know why…" He shrugged and took the holster off and put it on his desk. "I think I'm just tired and I went into this a little too quickly."

Reno let out a shaky breath he wasn't aware he had been holding. "Yeah… maybe you're just tired…"

* * *

**Authors Note:** Chapter four is out for you all to enjoy, finally! I have good news and bad news. Good news is I am quitting my job so I have more time to write, bad news is I will be worried about money! –laughs nervously- But I have school that needs paying attention, and stories to write. Besides, I live at home and still get an allowance! –giggles- So, next chapter will be out in a little while! Thanks for all the reviews, watches, and hits guys! You all rock! And please, review! 


	5. Chapter 5

_Warning__: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer__: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

* * *

Sephiroth looked down the table, eyeing all of the members. They all sat patiently at the dark wooden table, a look of expectancy in their faces. They were used to meetings, but all of them knew this one would be different.

Sephiroth let his eyes brush past Zack sitting at the end of the table who was trying not to fidget. He was sitting in a different spot today under Sephiroth's orders. Zack knew he was in trouble and Sephiroth wanted to see him squirm.

"So, how is the parlor doing?" Sephiroth asked Yazoo, dodging the obvious reason for the gathering. Yazoo flicked his hair behind his shoulder before answering.

"Fine, we have made a good amount of money in the past week. It seems the recent rise in stocks means more men have money to spend on frivolous things like gambling."

Sephiroth nodded and went through the rest of the business that needed to be discussed before turning his attention to Zack.

"And how is your mission going, Zackary?" Sephiroth asked, an eyebrow raised in question as he rested his hands on the table, fingers interlocking. Kadaj sat up more in his chair, obvious interest showing while Reno stopped flicking his pen around in his fingers, his eyes moving to Zack quickly.

Zack faulted slightly, but caught his composure quickly and leaned forward in his chair so Sephiroth could lock eyes with him. "I ran into a tight spot the other night and was unable to complete the mission without drawing attention to myself and my business." He stated quickly, his voice betraying none of his obvious discomfort.

Sephiroth nodded slowly and blinked, showing his disinterest in Zack's explanation. "So you were unable to successfully finish the mission?" He asked Zack quickly.

"No sir, but I just need more time to finish the job. This Strife individual is usually at his home or in the office, both places that have many people on all sides and-"

"I wanted this mission done soon, Zackary. No excuses. You could have gone in and finished it quickly if you wanted… what stopped you?" Sephiroth interrupted. Kadaj grinned and the others tried to seem impassive, except for Reno who looked ready to say something.

Sephiroth shot Reno a glare, preventing the red head from speaking.

"Nothing sir, he threw a vase and yelled, it brought attention to the matter."

"It wouldn't take too long to walk in and shoot, Zackary," Sephiroth stated, his voice dripping with the hint of venom. Other then that though, his face betrayed no emotion. "I assume you spoke to the target as well?" When Zack didn't say anything, Sephiroth continued. "I want you to finish him by the end of the week. You do understand what happens when you don't finish what you're told to do..."

Zack nodded quickly and swallowed. He was pretty sure everyone could hear him swallow, the thick saliva moving down his throat.

"Very good… I expect this to be dealt with. I am giving you a second chance, so don't let me down." Sephiroth, satisfied with the fear he instilled in Zack, continued on with the rest of the meeting. Kadaj smirked at Zack and winked before turning his attention back to the matter at hand, leaving Zack glaring at the table, his hand twisting around his wrist in a nervous way.

--XX--

Zack sat on the roof of his apartment, his feet dangling off of the edge of the building while a trail of smoke left his mouth and nose as he exhaled slowly, trying to relieve the stress. The sun was setting, basking Zack in an orange glow, while Reno stood a little ways away, his face shrouded in darkness as he rested against a wall, supporting the door that lead back downstairs.

"I don't see why it's so important…" Zack muttered more to himself then anything. He flicked his cigarette off of the building and watched it fall gracefully, ash littering the air.

Reno knew why it was important, but couldn't say anything to Zack. Betraying the family wasn't something Reno wanted to do… but did he want Zack to stumble around blindly. Scratching the back of his head at the base of his ponytail, Reno walked over to Zack and stood beside the raven haired male. "The guy made a fool of Sephiroth by not paying back what he owed and besting him twice. First not paying, and then living to see another day when he sends one of his best assassins after him. He's just a little pissed about it."

Zack scoffed slightly and shook his head. "I don't know why I even talked to the guy. I should have just shot and killed him… my minds just all over the place lately."

Reno watched the street below for a moment before sitting down beside Zack. He wrapped an arm lazily around Zack's shoulder and looked at him. "Thinking is for business men and doctors, yo. You should think about killing… about the gun in your hand… be the bullet, yo."

Zack turned his head slowly to look at Reno, a weird look on his face. "What…?" He asked, eyeing Reno warily.

"You know, become the bullet. Think of being fired from that gun and shooting forward. Feel the rush of killing someone, how amazing it feels to have all that power… better then an orgasm isn't it?" He grinned, hoping all this talk would get Zack in the mood to do the job.

Zack looked away and shrugged, managing to move Reno's arm away. "I guess… I don't know. Is killing really that great? I mean how many people have I killed?"

"A lot," Reno stated, taking his hand back. He looked back out at the city and sighed.

"Yeah, and I knew a few of 'em deserved it but some… I don't know, I shouldn't be saying anything. It's my job and that's what I do."

Reno nodded slowly. "I think you just need to build up that rush for the kill and you need something to release all this stress. Let's like… spar or something."

Zack raised an eyebrow and looked over at Reno. "We haven't sparred in a while… could be interesting. Need to brush up on my hand to hand combat. I won't always have a gun on me,"

Reno nodded and grinned brightly. "There's the spirit!" He stood up and stretched. "Let's go to the gym down the street, with the nice padded walls."

Zack stood up as well and followed Reno out of the building and down the street. A good spar would do him well.

--XX--

Two hours later Zack was panting heavily while leaning against a wall in the room, watching Reno carefully who appeared to be trying not to die. They hadn't actually hurt one another, but had managed to wear each other out.

"You ready to… give up?" Zack asked, wiping sweat away from his eyes.

"Fuck that," Reno shot back, and vaulted forward, taking Zack down with him. Zack hadn't been expecting the tackle, thinking Reno had used up most of his energy. He fell down on the mats with a thud, and groaned slightly as all of Reno's weight landed on him.

He opened his eyes slowly and looked up at Reno. "Fuckin' hell man, where did that energy come from?"

Reno grinned down at Zack, a smirk plastered on his face. "It came from my inner demon, telling me to kill!"

Zack pushed Reno off and sent the red head a look that clearly said Reno was crazy and should be in a hospital. "What the fuck is up with you and your fucked up psychological 'Be the gun, feel the rush' shit?"

Reno glared and stood up. He ran a hand though his damp locks and breathed a few times before he spoke. "I read it in a few books, you just think about doing something enough then it becomes easy. You're having trouble killing the guy and I know this mission is important… just thought I would help."

Zack smiled and stood up as well. He ruffled Reno's hair, a feeling of thankfulness washing over Zack. He actually felt like his life was a little more sane when Reno was there, watching his back. He knew Reno would catch him when he fell… or so he hoped.

Lately Reno had been just as jumpy and out of it as Zack, and it concerned him slightly. Zack was actually surprised he noticed it himself, what with being wrapped up in his own world. But lately Reno had been unable to make eye contact with Zack, as well as unable to talk to Zack like he used to.

It all started when his new mission started…

Zack snapped back to reality and let his hand slide down to Reno's shoulder where he squeezed gently. "Thanks, it's nice to know you care, love."

Reno jumped and pushed Zack away at the comment, venom in his eyes. "Don't call me that," he snarled out.

Zack stepped back, completely caught off guard (yet again) by Reno. "Whoa… okay… didn't know that nickname bothered you so much."

"It wouldn't bother me so much if you actually meant it," Reno shot back before turning around quickly as he headed towards the exit. He stopped at the door, his hand resting on the cold metal handle. Zack could see his hand shaking while his knuckles slowly turned white.

"Don't… don't fuck this up. Just… just make it work for the family and for yourself. Stop thinking and voicing your concerns… it's going to get you killed." Reno said before leaving the room, leaving Zack confused and all together even more fucked up then before.

* * *

**Authors Note**: Poor Reno… guy can't get a break, can he? There is a reason as to why I am making Reno all love struck on Zack. I mean it IS one of my favorite pairings, but it's more then just that! I know there was no Cloud in this chapter but he will show up in the next one, so don't worry about that! I know how much everyone loves our angry little blond. Sorry for the late update, I went into a little writers block and didn't feel like writing. BUT here is an update and I hope you enjoy. Thank you to everyone who was reviewed, watched and favorited this so far! And please, if you have time, review and tell me what you think. Your reviews mean the world to me! 


	6. Chapter 6

_Warning__: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer__: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while. _

* * *

Cloud's hand shook slightly with the force at which he was grasping his car keys. He had been on edge ever since that… that hit man (if you could even call him one) had shown up. Cloud had been tempted to go and talk to their boss and tell him how utterly idiotic everything had been carried out, but then that would just end up getting him killed. At least his would be killer had offered him a cool blood splatter effect on the wall.

But the more Cloud thought about it, the more he wished he had the balls to go and just die. It was probably a lot better then living his current life in a constant state of paranoia. He had sworn that he had seen guns in multiple places throughout the day, glinting in the light just ready to be picked up and fired, right into his head. Of course, he figured that a gun wouldn't be lying in the paper work Yuffie handed to him. But it didn't stop him from throwing them to the ground and kicking them away from Yuffie just in case she was sent to kill him as well. He later passed it off as the wrong papers to get Yuffie off his case. 

He walked through the large office tower and made it to the door that lead down to the parkade. It was late in the evening (Cloud had decided to stay and work later, which wasn't unusual in the slightest). Rude had offered to drive him home, noticing the intense gaze Cloud had on anything that was black and shiny, as well as his constant vigilance. Cloud could tell Rude was worried, but refused to tell him what was getting him on edge. Like he could tell someone; 'Hey, I fucked up big time and now I am going to die! Surprise!' It just didn't work that way. 

Running his hand through his hair, Cloud almost dropped his keys and swore. He walked down the mostly empty parking lot that was located below the office building. It was always so cold and echoes were very common, making Cloud feel exposed and uncomfortable. He walked quickly down the middle of the parkade towards his car, the small heel on his dress shoes clacked against the smooth concrete, causing Cloud to grit his teeth. He hated the sound but at the same time it was comforting to only hear his footsteps and not someone else's… until now. 

Cloud froze a few meters away from his car, thumb poised over the unlock button on his key's while his eyes widened. The footsteps were coming from behind and Cloud felt every muscle in his body stiffen. He tried to decide on whether he should unlock the car, sprint towards the vehicle and jump inside, or turn around and confront the stupid bastard. He took a deep breath and turned around quickly only to lock eyes with a pair of… blue eyes. 

"Fuck, what do you want, Rufus?" Cloud asked quickly, his heart rate going down considerably. 

Rufus chuckled softly and brushed away a piece of hair from his field of view. "Just leaving the office, same as you… but I was glad to run into you."

Cloud rolled his eyes and turned around to continue heading towards his car. "I'm really not in the mood to talk right now," 

Rufus moved quickly and grabbed Cloud's arm. "Since when are you ever in the mood to talk?" He asked before twirling Cloud around to face him. "But no, talking isn't what I want and you know it…" 

Cloud felt Rufus caress his cheek and he moved away quickly. "It was a one time thing Rufus, so fuck off and go home. Or is the misses not happy with you fucking office workers when you're not at home?"

Rufus growled slightly but didn't back off. "I know it was a one time thing… but I enjoyed it and I know you did too," He grinned and winked at Cloud. "You ripped the sheets on my bed when you came… that was hard to explain to Scarlette."

Cloud glared and shoved Rufus away again. "Don't fucking flatter yourself, I ripped them because you almost pushed me off the bed. I could have gotten the same kind of fuck from a cheap hooker."

He then turned around and stormed the rest of the way to his car, ignoring the angry shout coming from Rufus. He needed a drink.

--XX--

Soft music played in the background, and the clinking of glasses on counters could be heard. The lights were dim and it was relatively quiet except for the soft murmur of clients talking or men taking their women out for a drink.

Cloud's head rested on the polished surface of the dark bar bench, his gaze directed at the amber liquid in his glass. It was hard to tell if he was actually looking at the alcohol, or was just starring through it, watching the distorted images of people walking by affect the buzz that had overcome him.

"You okay?" A soft voice asked, and Cloud slowly lifted his head. He rested his bloodshot gaze on a curious barmaid, and scowled slightly.

"I'm almost out of my drink, Tifa…" He mumbled, looking down at his glass. Tifa rolled her eyes and filled it again. 

"That's your last glass and then I am cutting you off. You look horrible, also, give me your keys, you're not driving." 

Cloud rolled his eyes and reached in his wrinkled pocket and handed over the keys before taking a sip of his drink. He watched Tifa clean a glass and talk to a woman sitting a little ways away about her job, before Cloud felt someone sit down beside him on one of the stools.

He slowly turned his head and locked eyes with a familiar and all too terrifying pair of violet orbs. He sucked in a deep rush of air and starred for a while, waiting for Zack to speak.

"This place is kinda nice," Was the first thing out of the raven haired male's mouth as he went to look around the bar. "It's got this nice relaxed feeling."

Cloud glared and took a large swig of his drink. "Yeah, it's fucking peachy keen. Especially when you showed up. It just makes it all that more relaxing."

Zack chuckled softly, and to Cloud it sounded like he was laughing at him, and not laughing at the joke. 

"Yeah, I can understand that… do you come here often?" To tell the truth, Zack was actually here by fluke. Sephiroth, deciding he wanted him to do something productive while he waited for the right moment, had sent Zack to go speak with another potential client. It just happened to be at the bar Cloud was wallowing in.

Cloud snorted and nodded. "Only place that keeps me sort of sane… although I've never really been sane. Can't be sane in a situation like this…" He waved his hand around flippantly while starring down at his drink.

Zack could see the blond was incredibly drunk, but decided not to say anything about it. He was actually surprised the younger male was talking to him, but Zack thought it was best to listen to him before taking him out in the back to shoot him. 

He _had_ to finish this job. This was just a good opportunity. 

"What kind of situation? You mean my uh… job and my link to you?" He asked, eying the people around him who could easily hear the conversation. 

"That and life… I mean who the hell sane would move to a city like this, huh? And… and who would try and get into a situation that promises to make you powerful and rich, and yet leaves you gasping and struggling for air… like you're drowning. I'm just a small fish in a big pond right now… like everything is so big and I try and eat smaller fish in the hopes of me getting bigger… but I just end up getting swallowed by large ones with purply coloured eyes and spiky hair." Cloud explained, his eyes still boring holes into the bar tabletop. 

Even though the end part of what Cloud had said made Zack smile slightly, it was more of a smile that was trying to hide the shock of what Cloud had said. How come… how come he could connect so easily?

"I don't… I don't know what you're talking about, sorry, mate." Zack explained, looking away quickly. He wouldn't admit how close to home what Cloud had said had hit him. He wasn't supposed to be thinking like that. He was supposed to be sitting at a table, meeting a new client after shooting Cloud. Zack then stiffened. He put a name to him in his head. Cloud wasn't just some target… he hadn't said 'Shoot the Target'. He had said the name. It was a million times worse if you acknowledged the targets name in your head. It was okay to say it out loud, but if you actually started to think about them being a human being… you were in some deep shit.

Silence cocooned them despite the chatting going on around them. Zack tugged at his tie gently and then let his hand slide down and feel the gun resting at his side. He breathed deeply, willing the conflicting thoughts to go away. 

"You wanna fuck?" 

Zack turned his head quickly to Cloud, eyebrows raised. This guy kept surprising him. "What… what did you just ask?"

Cloud slowly directed his gaze to Zack, and gave the older male a blank stare. "I said; do you want to fuck? I could use one and you look like you would be good in bed… might as well get laid before I die, right?" He slurred out. He then drank the rest of his drink and looked around for Tifa, wanting more.

Zack snapped out of his daze and shook his head. His hand slowly slid away from his gun and rested on his own thigh for a moment. "Nah… I won't be killing you tonight," He mumbled and stood up, clasping the blonds shoulder before leaving. Cloud looked up quickly and followed the male out of the bar with his eyes. 

"You okay, Cloud?" Tifa asked, coming back to him. Cloud looked up quickly and nodded slowly. 

"Yeah… yeah, still alive."

--XX—

"I'm so stupid… so fucking stupid. Fuck, what the fuck was I thinking?" Zack mumbled as he walked down the street, his long gait taking him far away from the bar, far from the potential client and far from Cloud. 

"Fuck, I mean the target, not Cloud," He practically snarled out. A woman and her boyfriend walking by jumped slightly, and the boyfriend hurried her along. 

Zack should have taken the hit. Should have agreed to the fuck, taken him to the back and shot him there. But… but something hit him. What Cloud had said had hit home closer then Zack had liked. Also, Zack couldn't kill the blond in that state, not while he was drunk and disheveled. 

Running a frustrated hand through messy hair, Zack tugged at a few strands absentmindedly as he moved briskly down the street and around a corner where he ran to the Pachinko parlor his 'family' owned.

Slowing down his pace, Zack walked into the still busy parlor, trying to block out the sound of the machines twirling and the clicking sounds from the silver balls dropping into baskets. Walking to the back, Zack stepped into the back room and spotted Yazoo at a desk, counting through sheets of paper with his hair tied up in a messy ponytail. He didn't even spare Zack a glance and simply spoke. 

"You're back. That's good. Sephiroth wishes to speak with you about the new client." He said, and went back to his counting. 

Zack froze and then thought for a moment, realization dawning on him. He had been so absorbed in getting away from Cloud that he had forgotten the real reason why he had visited the bar. 

Yazoo glanced up finally and eyed Zack. "You can leave now…" He stated, and Zack could feel the males gaze on him as he left for the stairs that lead upstairs. He walked to Sephiroth's office and knocked three times before entering. 

He caught Sephiroth rubbing his eyes, and almost paused at the human behavior he was displaying. Sephiroth immediately dropped his hands when he saw Zack and raised an eyebrow. 

"Back so soon, Zackary?" He asked, quickly blocking any questions Zack would have when it came to Sephiroth's physical and mental status. 

"Yeah… ran into a snag," Zack stated, scratching the back of his head awkwardly. Sephiroth made no indication he should sit, so he was left standing by the door, trying to be calm about the situation. 

"A… snag?" Sephiroth asked as his entire form became stiff.

"Yeah, he didn't show… or if he did I didn't see him." Zack said, lying through his teeth. "I wait for a bit, but didn't see him."

Sephiroth nodded slowly. "Well if he was serious, he will call back… you never were very good with keeping appointments anyways."

Zack cringed inside, knowing that had a few different meanings. Zack turned to leave when Sephiroth's controlled voice stopped him. 

"Zackary... I would be careful in how you act and what you say. You may be one of us, but don't forget where you came from and who made you what you are today… it can be just as easily taken away, as it was as easily given."

Zack nodded and walked out of the room, the door closing behind him with a dull thud. He rested his back against a wall in the hallway and slowly slid down, falling down to rest his head between his knees. 

' _-Who would try and get into a situation that promises to make you powerful and rich, and yet leaves you gasping and struggling for air… like you're drowning?' _

* * *

**Authors Note:** GAH! I am so sorry for this being late, but I had a lot of stuff happen. My dad had a heart attack a little while ago so for a week in there things were pretty hectic (he's home and doing well now though, so no worried!) and then I kept getting all these creative writing assignments in English which took up a lot of my writing time… and I have just been lazy! Please forgive me! I made this chapter a little longer just because it took a long time to write. But I wanna thank all of you who reviews, watched and favorited this! You guys mean so much, and I am so happy to see the reviews! I have been getting a lot each chapter and it makes me SO happy! I love all of you guys! –hugs-


	7. Chapter 7

_Warning__: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer__: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

* * *

Despite the sun shining from outside, the day was cool and crisp. One of the windows in the bedroom had been left open, keeping Cloud curled up under the white sheets he had wrapped himself in. He kept his eyes firmly shut, not wanting to open them. Yesterday had happened, he wasn't going to deny that, but that didn't mean he wanted to deal with it just yet.

An arm came and wrapped itself around Cloud, and the blond almost relaxed and let himself be pulled into the warmth. It would be so easy to surrender completely to it all, to not put his guard up. Being with someone, even if it was loveless, made Cloud feel needed in a small way. Like he was actually worth something and that everything he did wasn't completely forgotten, because at least someone had noticed him enough to want to fuck him.

He took a shaky breath that went unnoticed by the person beside him. Instead he was pulled closer and kissed on the shoulder. It was sloppy and Cloud could feel the spit connected to him. He frowned and cracked an eye open while he pulled away. Sitting up, Cloud's sensitive skin hit the cool air, and with it came the reality of last night and how he had been weak enough to look for small comfort in a warm body.

"Morning…" Rufus said a lazy, an almost sleazy grin displayed on his arrogant features. Doing what he always did to protect himself, Cloud built up the wall again and glared.

"We're going to be late for work," He said, getting out of the bed quickly. Rufus reached out and grabbed Cloud's arm, pulling him back down.

"I paid for this nice hotel room, and now you're just going to leave?"

Cloud ripped his arm away and nodded. "Yeah, that's exactly it. Last night was another mistake and I think it would be best if we just forget about it." He explained while putting his pants on, being a little angry while doing it.

Rufus rolled his eyes and sighed. "Fine, go to work…" He waved his hand above his head, not wanting to fight the blond about it. Cloud felt a pang of annoyance and slight hurt go through him. He had asked Rufus to lay off and he had, but at the same time it was nice to be needed…

He scoffed slightly at his own thoughts and started to do the buttons up on his shirt. Grabbing his jacket and briefcase he felt around for his keys and remembered Tifa taking them.

"I snagged your keys from Tifa, they are on the small table in the hallway by the door," Rufus mumbled out, his arm over his eyes, blocking out the morning sun.

Cloud paused a second, wondering how Rufus knew he was looking for his keys, as well as being a little shocked that the older male had actually gotten them from Tifa.

"Thanks," Cloud mumbled and slid his shoes on.

Rufus rolled over on to his stomach and smirked. "And hey, you ever need another fuck just come to me… you know now that a simple phone call will work."

Cloud growled slightly and left the hotel room and started on his way towards his car that he had left in front of the bar the night before.

--XX—

"I found out that our client waited for a while, and did indeed see you… only he didn't come speak to you because you were already engaged in another conversation with someone…" Sephiroth said, a silver eyebrow raised. "Who was that person you were speaking too, Zackary?"

Zack's insides froze, and he stayed rooted on the spot. Sephiroth most likely already knew who he was speaking to, and just wanted to see if Zack would lie to him. He knew that, yet Zack was almost tempted to lie anyways.

"I was speaking to the target… Cloud Strife, sir." He replied, trying to stay calm. "I wanted to see if I could do the hit but… but things didn't work out well."

Sephiroth nodded slowly and tapped his fingers on the wooden desk in his office. "I am assigning you a partner in this mission," He said finally while locking eyes with Zack. "I don't want to see someone like you go to waist, but I also want this mission completed… at all costs. Therefore I would like someone to accompany you to make sure there are no more complications."

"You could assign Reno, we have done a few missions together and-" He was cut off when Kadaj walked into the room, smirking.

"You called for me, sir?" He asked, acting proper and on the ball for Sephiroth. Sephiroth's eyes narrowed slightly, but he nodded.

"Kadaj will be working with you," He stated, looking back at Zack. Zack couldn't help but drop his jaw and snort slightly.

"Really… you want me to work with him? Fuck, this is bull shit!" Zack said, throwing his hands up in the air.

Sephiroth shot Zack a look and stood up quickly. "I am helping you here, Zackary. I don't want you throwing away your entire life for something as trivial as this. You do the hit and if that means you have to have someone work with you, then so be it." He hissed out, finally showing some emotion.

Zack was a little taken aback, and didn't know what to say. He hadn't expected Sephiroth to get so angry and show it. But that didn't mean he wasn't angry as well. Glaring back, he turned around quickly and stormed out of the room, slamming the door hard behind him.

"Fucking selfish little prick," Kadaj said, looking at the door. Sephiroth sat back down and pinched the bridge of his nose. "If I were him I would-"

"That's the point, Kadaj. You aren't him." Sephiroth lifted his gaze up at Kadaj, and the younger male had a hard time pin pointing the emotion in his superior's eyes.

"Yeah… yeah I am not." He nodded and then decided to leave as well.

--XX—

"All of this is so fucking stupid!" Zack said, walking back and forth on the roof of the building. Reno was sitting on the ledge, kicking his feet slightly as he let Zack rant.

"I mean, does he really think I need some fucking teenager to watch over me and to make sure I don't fuck this up? I did some stupid stuff but I am not going to just back down. Cloud is going to die and that's the main point!"

Reno didn't say anything, nor indicate he was listening. He just starred down at the city street, some of his hair coming out of his ponytail to blow in the wind and stick to his lips.

"Does he really think I'm unable to kill?" Zack asked, finally stopping his pacing to stand near Reno.

"Isn't that the point, yo? You don't want to kill anymore…" Reno said slowly. He looked up at Zack and squinted slightly when he looked at the sun. He was unable to see Zack's face clearly, which made him unable to read his emotions.

"Yeah but… still, this is so fucked up. He should have given you the opportunity to help, seeing as how I apparently need it." He growled out and sat down beside Reno. Reno just nodded and lit a smoke.

Zack frowned and directed his attention elsewhere, trying not to find the silence from the red head unnerving. Finally he left his gaze on a crow that was perched on the roof opposite of them. Reno had been acting off since the incident at the gym, and Zack was hesitant to bring it up. Call him thick and unable to catch on, but he didn't understand why Reno was so upset about everything. Usually the red head was carefree and happy, and although Zack's current mission was riding on both of them, they had been in worse situations and been okay. The crow flew off of the top of the building when Zack heard Reno speak again.

"You need to stop calling him Cloud…" He sounded forced in his advice, like he was hesitant to help. "Like, stop thinking of him as a person and you can do it."

Zack nodded and pursed his lips slightly. "But that's not all of it. It's not Cloud- Shit I mean the target- that's throwing me off, it's just the not wanting to kill."

Reno snorted softly and Zack barely heard it. "Yeah… sure, it's not about Cloud." He said the males name with venom and Zack almost felt like Reno had physically hurt him.

"Are you okay?" He asked slowly, hesitantly reaching out to grasp Reno's shoulder. Reno immediately shrugged off the raven haired male's hand and sighed.

"It's nothing… just I think that you're too blind to notice something is definitely wrong with you, me, Sephiroth and this entire situation. Also, you seem unable to really take a look at why you're hesitant to kill and-" He suddenly stopped and narrowed his eyes as he looked down on the street.

Zack was about to shove Reno and demand he say more when he looked down as well to see a nervous male walk into the back door at the parlor. Both he and Reno shot up and hurried downstairs, their previous conversation gone from memory.

"What's going-" Zack asked but was cut off when Barret dragged them into the meeting room. Sephiroth was already in the room and was moving to sit down, while the thumping of footsteps could be heard as other members quickly filed into the room. Zack hesitantly moved to his seat, but didn't sit down.

Everyone else seemed as high strung, and it made Zack feel uneasy when so many members were missing, out on their daily 'chores'. They were definitely unprepared for this.

"Send him in," Sephiroth said after everyone who was coming was there. Zack noticed Vincent was missing, making him even more uneasy. Vincent, although he was a cold calculating asshole, usually stayed by Sephiroth's side and knew exactly what he was doing and could handle most situations.

Yazoo went to open the door and the nervous male from before walked inside. He was shaking slightly, and sweating greatly. Zack thought he recognized the man, but didn't know from where. Reno took in a sharp breath and tensed visibly.

"Ah, Mr. Tanzo, how nice to see you again," Sephiroth replied, faking courtesy. "I haven't seen you for a year now… how did your business deal work for you?"

"It fucking pulled me under, my company f-found out about the deal!" The man- Mr. Tanzo- replied. "I t-thought it would work, but my c-company went under! M-my wife left me and I can't see my kids anymore! Y-you, you ruined my life!" He said, his voice hitching with every shaky breath he took.

Sephiroth sent a glance to the clock before looking back at Mr. Tanzo. "I am sorry to hear things didn't work out, but we upheld our end of the deal. You got what you had asked for… you didn't ask for the perfect life."

The male laughed- but it wasn't one of amusement, but one of insanity. From a man who had nothing left to lose. It chilled Zack to the bone.

"I didn't ask for this either! I want my life back, and I want you to rot in hell!" Mr. Tanzo then moved to grab something from his coat. There was sudden movement in the meeting room as people grabbed for one thing or another while another person- Zack thought it was Kadaj- went in front of Sephiroth.

There was a terrified scream from Mr. Tanzo, but it was cut short when the sound of a gun being fired resonated throughout the room. Mr. Tanzo stood there a moment, a hole in his head before dropping to the ground, the small gun in his hand dropping to the ground as he fell. A 'cool' blood splatter effect was left on the wall.

All eyes in the room turned to look at the smoking barrel of the gun that had taken the shot, and soon their eyes trailed to a pair of violet eyes that were starring down at the dead Mr. Tanzo.

"No hesitation…" Reno muttered, looking at Zack.

"And that's why your job shouldn't be this difficult." Sephiroth said, his voice shaking slightly as he locked eyes with Zack.

* * *

**Authors Note**: DUN DUN DUN! Zack isn't so hesitant to kill people as much as he shows… ooh… is this because maybe he connected with Cloud? Or maybe because he's trigger happy but can't shoot people with blue eyes and blond hair because of some genetic mutation? WHO KNOWS? I know… and I shall reveal all later on. Anyways I wrote this about a week ago (Yay for not procrastinating) but I decided to post it now. Anyone else notice how many ZackxCloud fanfictions are popping up now? Also, woots, hope you guys are all having fun playing Crisis Core! Oh, and thank you for all the reviews and favorites and watches! I love all of you guys!!


	8. Chapter 8

_Warning__: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer__: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

* * *

Zack had been lying on his bed for a good twenty minutes, starring up at the cracked ceiling while he tapped the cell phone that was lying in his hands with one finger. He was not looking forward to today. Well, more like he was dreading the entire day. He had to finish the job, _and_ he had to work with Kadaj.

Kadaj, over the past few days, had taken every opportunity to point out to Zack that he was doing him a favour. That he was able to shoot and kill and not care. The more Zack thought about it, the more he wanted to punch something or someone… preferably Kadaj. The kid had too much time on his hands to think of fucked up insults.

The Kadaj situation had been made worse by the incident with the washed up business man. Zack really couldn't tell them why he had automatically shot the man. It was reflexes, but he also didn't hesitate taking the gun out and shooting, unlike he always seemed to do in regards to Cloud. Sephiroth questioned Zack about it, but seemed fairly angry and wouldn't really listen to what Zack had to say. What was he going to say anyways? The usual 'I don't know' and 'I will finish it next time'?

Running a hand over his face, Zack sighed heavily. He was about to get up when he heard the door open. Sitting up quickly he slid his hand over to the gun on the bed before he spotted Reno walking into the room. The red head smiled slightly at Zack, and he returned the gesture with a small wave. Things had become even worse since last week between him and Reno.

"Hey… Kadaj is looking for you. Thinks I'm his little secretary and sent me looking for you. I would be more then happy to pretend I didn't look and just bugger off," Reno stated, standing by the door.

When Zack didn't say anything, Reno continued. "Not that I want to leave… just you know, I know you really don't want to go do this with Kadaj…"

Zack laughed slightly and nodded. "Understatement of the year," He shook his head and looked out the window.

"He that much of a pain?" Reno asked, figuring he would sit down on the chair by the desk. Zack took that as a good sign, meaning maybe Reno wanted to talk.

"You have no idea…" Zack ran a hand over his face again and blew out a large puff of air, causing a few stray hairs to fly up for a moment. "So… how have you been? Haven't seen you for a week."

Reno shrugged and pulled out a smoke, lighting it. "I was sent on some stupid thing… that was stupid…"

Zack raised an eyebrow and laughed slightly. "Very eloquent of you."

Reno snorted and nodded his head while laughing gently. "I thought so… But no, I had to kind of… close myself off and stuff for a while. Just think."

Zack nodded, knowing the feeling all too well. "Yeah. Hey… sorry for the past few weeks. Things have been really fucked up and I dragged you into it all."

Reno waved his hand slightly and took a drag of his smoke, his eyes narrowing slightly as the nicotine filled his lungs. "Don't worry about it. I think everyone's been on edge. But hey, soon you're going to get the job done, Seph's gonna calm down, and we can move on."

"Yeah, exactly." Zack smiled slightly, glad he was talking to Reno again, even if there was still an air of awkwardness around them. Reno finished his smoke and put it out in the dirty ashtray before standing up.

"Well I should get going. I can tell your girlfriend you're not here." Reno winked and headed to the door.

"Are you calling Kadaj my girlfriend?" Zack asked, his voice rising slightly out of shock. Reno winked and saluted.

"He's tiny like a girl! You would like him! With his soft, gay little haircut and his slim hips!" Reno said while making crude shapes in the air.

"You're a dick," Zack said, rolling his eyes. Reno laughed and nodded.

"What can I say? I speak fluent Dicklish!"

Zack just starred at Reno for a moment before bursting out laughing. He nodded his head and stood up. "Yeah… yeah you do. If that's even a language."

He then moved to hug Reno, but realized it might be weird. Reno noticed the pause and sighed before going in to finish the hug. "Good luck, alright?"

Zack nodded, patting Reno's back a few times before moving away slightly. "Thanks…"

Reno smiled and winked before opening the door, leaving Zack alone in the apartment. For some reason, Reno leaving left Zack feeling a little confused and lost… he had a bad feeling about tonight, like something was about to be broken beyond repair… something was going to change them all. He wanted to tell Reno about it, but he couldn't make himself chase after the red head. Sighing, he shut the door, figuring it was just his nerves, and things would clear up soon.

They had to clear up.

--XX—

A few hours later, Zack found himself walking to one of the parked cars behind the parlour, Kadaj walking beside him with an air of purpose around him.

"You shouldn't look so happy…" Zack said, clutching the keys in his hands. He opened the driver's side to the sleek, black car, before opening the passenger's side.

"Why shouldn't I? We're finally dealing with this shit. We have information on where he is tonight; all we have to do is wait." Kadaj got into the car and made himself comfortable on the plush leather seat.

Zack pulled on the seatbelt and buckled himself in before sliding the keys into the ignition. Pulling out of the alleyway, Zack made his way to the bar Cloud had been seen at.

The drive was relatively silent, what with Kadaj staring out the window and Zack holding onto the steering wheel so hard his knuckles had gone white. With Kadaj being with him, there was no room for fuck ups. Everything would go smoothly and it would be over and done with. Zack nodded his head, trying to convince himself while Kadaj sent him a weird look.

"Just calm down," He growled out, rolling his eyes. "Stop worrying about it. You'll finish the job, whether you want to or not."

Zack rolled his eyes as well and continued to drive down the narrow, rain soaked streets until they got to the bar. Parking a little ways away, Zack turned the car off and simply waited. Kadaj kicked his feet up on the dashboard only to have them knocked down by Zack.

"Don't fuck with Sephiroth's car…" Zack said, sitting back in his seat. Kadaj scoffed slightly and rested his chin on his hand and stared out the window again.

They sat in silence for what seemed like hours, both of them watching the door of the bar carefully. Zack clenched and unclenched his hands over and over again, trying to work out some of the pent up energy in him.

Zack was about to suggest that maybe Cloud had already left and they go back, when a familiar blond stepped out of the bar. He was holding a brunettes hand as they walked out and headed to the side of the building. Zack frowned slightly and Kadaj grinned.

"One night stand…" Kadaj winked at Zack and got out of the car, not even waiting to see if the older male would follow. He started down the street towards the back alley, while Zack frantically wrestled with his seatbelt before getting out of the car as well. Chasing Kadaj down, he grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

"Wait, don't jump the gun!" Zack said, holding on to the silver teens arm a little harder then necessary. Kadaj pulled his arm back and glared.

"No, I will not have you going on about second fucking thoughts. This ends right now. He's in a back alley with some guy, who could ask for a better opportunity?"

"Yeah, except for the fact that he's with someone right now! Someone who can see our faces and fucking rat us out!" Zack didn't like killing random people to get to the target, but Kadaj didn't seem to mind.

"I'll handle the guy, you take out the target." He stated simply before taking off again. They rounded the corner and Zack set his gaze upon the brunette shoving his lips hard against Cloud's. Cloud's back was pressed against the brick wall, parts of his suit fabric catching on the rough surface.

Zack froze a moment but it didn't stop Kadaj. Striding forward, Kadaj grabbed the brunette by the shirt collar and pulled him roughly away from Cloud. Turning him slightly, Kadaj locked eyes with the confused male and smiled.

"You stole my boyfriend," He then pulled out the gun and shot the male in the head, causing him to drop to the ground. Zack couldn't look at the body and slowly raised his gaze to look at Cloud, who was pressed against the wall, chest heaving as his eyes stared down at the now lifeless body. His face turned deathly pale and Zack thought he was going to pass out.

Putting his gun back, Kadaj smiled and patted his hands together as if to dust the gunpowder on them off. "Your turn,"

Zack swallowed and looked away from Cloud who seemed frozen on the spot. Taking the gun out of its holster on his side, Zack cocked the gun and pointed it at Cloud's forehead. Sky blue eyes lifted themselves from the body on the ground and slowly looked at Zack.

Zack froze, unable to pull the trigger. Looking into those eyes, Zack could feel the emotion behind them. The pain, hate, panic, and… defeat. Zack reeled from the emotions and almost dropped the gun. He felt like he was gazing into his own eyes. Feeling everything he felt, only ten times as much.

"Just shoot him!" Kadaj yelled, but despite it all, it sounded muffled and fuzzy in Zack's head. Cloud slumped against the wall slightly, as if to say it was okay if he did it. Shaking his head Zack slid his gun back in its holster in one fluid moment and moved quickly to punch Kadaj right under the jaw, sending the male to the ground.

Grabbing Cloud's arm, Zack ran for all he was worth, dragging the confused business man behind him. Kadaj managed to stand up and fumbled for his gun, anger in his eyes.

"Get the fuck back here!" He yelled, firing a few shots, all of which hit an old, rusted sign with a dancing wombat on it.

Cloud stumbled slightly when the bullets passed by, but Zack kept him upright and continued to run. All that was going through his head at that moment was to run and get away. He didn't know how long he would run, or where he was running, but he knew that he had to keep going. They soon turned another corner and Zack saw Cloud's apartment building up ahead. Cloud knew where they were and grabbed his keys out of his pocket and entered the building. Running up the stairs, they got to Cloud's apartment and Cloud (after fumbling with the keys) opened the door and let Zack in.

Shutting the door and locking it, Cloud turned around and stared Zack down, his face masked with an emotion Zack couldn't decipher. They were breathing heavily and Zack felt like the weight of the universe had been put on his shoulders. At that moment the complete severity of the situation came to light as he looked at the male before him. He felt like he was drowning, and blindly reached for something, anything to steady himself.

He had betrayed the family… once and for all.

* * *

**Authors Note**_**:**_ Okay, few things to say! First, there is a reason why I am making Cloud sleep around. He has some issues… major issues. But that pretty much sums Cloud up, really. Issues, issues, issues. Secondly, the guy Kadaj killed was no one in the FF world or any world in particular. He was expendable crewman #2. Thirdly, that 'Dicklish' line from Reno was a line my friend (Morose Scarlet) said at school one day, and then told me I should add it in, and it's such a Reno line. So, to appease the god, I added it in! And lastly thanks for reading this! I keep finding plot holes and I try and patch 'em up, so if you see anything that doesn't fit, please tell me so I can try and explain later! xD This story is pretty damn hard to write at times, but I love it! Thanks for the reviews as well, they mean a lot that you take the time to reply!


	9. Chapter 9

_Warning__: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer__: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

**WARNING: This Chapter is NOT worksafe. Just warning you all of the 'Cover the childrens eyes!' and 'Crap, my boss walked in!' content!**

* * *

Deep blue eyes bore into Zack, as the hit man tried to steady himself against a table in the middle of the apartment. It took a moment for Zack to look up and meet the gaze of the businessman, answers demanding to be told.

"What… the fuck… was that?" Cloud asked, voice shaking with anger, fear, and absolute confusion.

Zack shook his head and ran a shaky hand through his spiky locks. "We…. W-we need to keep moving." He mumbled quickly before hurrying around the apartment, closing the blinds and turning the lights off. He was desperate to do something, _anything_ to keep his mind off what was going on. He couldn't tell Cloud why he did it; how do you explain something you don't even understand yourself?

Cloud hurried over to Zack and ripped his hand away from the blind cord, eyes burning with anger, "Tell me what the _fuck_ is going on." He hissed out, and Zack backed off slightly. Cloud had made peace in the alleyway just a moment ago; he was fully prepared to die in the back of an alleyway, half drunk and completely terrified. He found it fitting in an odd way. Dying in such a fucked up way, to go with how well he fucked up his life. Most would say he was still young, being twenty-six and all, and that he had more time to fuck it up… or you know, make it better.

But standing in front of the man sent to kill him, heart racing a million beats per minute, Cloud figured he had hit the lowest of the low.

When Zack didn't answer and simply stood still, Cloud tightened his grip on the male's arm. Some little part in the back of his head was hoping that it would provoke Zack enough that he would just grab the gun from his side and finish it. Create the cool blood effect on the wall and walk away, end Cloud's misery and paranoia and go on with his life.

Instead, Zack pulled away and frowned. "I don't know," He finally admitted. "Happy now?"

Cloud shook his head and growled before walking away to begin pacing. "No I am not fucking happy. I am actually damn pissed off that you save my life and won't tell me fucking why!"

Zack rolled his eyes and went back to closing the blinds. "Just don't look gift horses in the mouth. I saved your life and probably just ended mine, so be happy."

Cloud continued to pace, his breathing growing heavy as the muscles in his hand twitched slightly, ready in an instant to grab something and throw it.

Zack was in the same situation, anger and confusion and pure panic running through every fibre of his being. "Look, we need to go somewhere else… Kadaj is going to go running back to my boss and they are going to come check this place out too."

Cloud shook his head and tugged at his blond spikes. "No, we are not going to run. You are going to leave and I am going to go to the bathroom and slit my wrists and everything will be okay."

"What the fuck?" Zack yelled, and then realized maybe yelling wasn't the best thing to do while in this situation. Still, it didn't prevent Zack from rushing over to twist Cloud around and hold his shoulders in his shaking hands.

"Don't you ever say that! I fucking put my life on the line for you for some unknown reason and I don't need you shitting on it." He hissed out.

Cloud stayed still for a moment before he shoved Zack away and moved to punch him. Zack dodged the strike and grabbed Cloud's fist in his hand, twisting it slightly to prevent Cloud from moving again.

"Stop fucking around!" He growled, closing in on Cloud. Both breathing heavily as they glared at each other, before Zack moved in; capturing Cloud's lips in an angry, hard kiss.

When Zack released Cloud's wrist the blond harshly shoved Zack back. They stood there, eyes locked as both of them tried to figure out why he had kissed Cloud. It seemed like hours had passed before Cloud moved forward and grabbed Zack, brining him back in for another kiss that was just as fierce as before.

All the pent up anger and confusion boiled over and Zack grabbed on to Cloud desperately, the kiss becoming messy and open mouthed as they tried to breathe while continuing to kiss. They broke away briefly and Zack took the opportunity to press Cloud against the wall. He noticed for a moment that Cloud's back was pressed against a light switch, but the blond didn't seem to care.

Breathing heavily, Zack went down to bite Cloud's neck… hard. Crying out, Cloud hit his head on the wall as he tossed his head back before pulling Zack's hair to bring him back up for a lip-bruising kiss.

As Zack half carried Cloud to what he suspected was the bedroom, he vaguely pondered the situation. He had no idea why he kissed Cloud, and still had no idea why he was about to fuck the blond into the mattress. He figured it was something they both needed, just a way to find release and to let go, even if only for a moment.

Falling on to the crisp red sheets, Zack sat up and took his shirt off before being flipped down on to the mattress by Cloud. Straddling the raven haired male's hips, Cloud cupped the back of his neck and kissed him while grinding down. Zack gasped and scarred hands, from years of being on the street and fighting for a living, slid up Cloud's shirt before stopping to rip it.

White buttons flew off of the dress shirt as Zack ripped the garment off of Cloud's form, only stopping to flick over a nipple. Moaning, Cloud let his guard down for a moment and Zack flipped Cloud again, trying to gain the upper hand. There was a battle for dominance as Cloud desperately fought to be on top, not wanting this man above him so easily.

Zack ended up winning after the biting of teeth to the neck and ear, hands sliding over sweat slicked skin, moans coupled with hisses and groans, and a few dominating shoves. Zack worked Cloud's pants off, hands shaking as he did so and came face to face with the blonde's member. He noticed Cloud glaring up at him and noticed the red tinge on his cheeks, not just from the heat and moisture in the air.

He grinned slightly and was met with a half hearted attempt to smack him. Zack caught Cloud's hand and flipped the blond over so his ass was in the air. Cloud squirmed and managed to sit up and bring Zack's head over his shoulder by grabbing a chunk of black hair, and kissed him hard. The angle was odd and their teeth knocked together as spit stuck to each other's mouth, but both of them found themselves wrapped in a world of passion and anger.

Moments later, Cloud had managed to moved around and work Zack's pants off half way, exposing the raven haired male to him. Grabbing his erection, Cloud tugged on it causing Zack to growl softly and moved in to bite and suck on the sensitive skin on Cloud's neck, leaving bruise marks all over the pure white skin. Tangling his nimble fingers in the spiky black mess of hair, Cloud rested his cheek on the top of Zack's head as they slid together, a moment of bliss between them. They weren't thinking about the situations going on in their lives right now, all that mattered as the sweat between their skin, the soft moans and grunts, and the feeling of release.

It was broken when Zack pushed Cloud back down and flipped him over. Shoving his pants down a little farther, Zack positioned himself as Cloud looked over his shoulder quickly. A few pumps to his own erection to get himself slick, Zack rammed into Cloud, not bothering to prepare him.

Cloud cried out and grabbed a pillow, stuffing the corner in his mouth as he continued to make sounds of displeasure and pain. Resting over him, Zack breathed heavily and grasped Cloud's hips, more then likely creating bruises from the force at which he was trying to stabilize himself. Moments passed as Zack's head rested between his arms, long black strands covering his face as he waited for Cloud. He felt a pang of regret for sliding in so quickly without warning, but as soon as Cloud rocked back on him, he knew it was okay.

Sliding out, Zack moved back in, causing Cloud to moan and hiss, pain still evident, but being pushed out as Zack rocked in and out. The bed creaked as they slid together, Cloud's moans becoming more and more out of passion then pain.

As Zack rocked above the blond, he tried not to think about anything. Just tried to let himself be consumed by the pleasure he was experiencing and the release he was going to gain. Not the confusion and fear that wracked his body. His movements became frantic and he could feel Cloud tighten around him. A few more thrusts and Zack was coming hard, his mind flashing between white and sound. Sephiroth's words to him, Reno's words of encouragement and Cloud's defeated, trembling voice.

Cloud came soon after, his mind going blank as he did so. Not thinking about his death, nor the death of the male in the alleyway. Not thinking about the fact that the man sent to kill him was above him at this moment, his hot breath against his neck. This was good for both of them. A one time thing meant to make them see the truth and just disconnect from the confusion around them.

Cloud collapsed first, and he could feel Zack slide out before falling down on the bed beside him, his breathing heavy. They stayed like that for a while, both of them listening to the sound of rain as it began outside. A flash of bright light caused Cloud to look away and notice the dragon tattoo on Zack's back, the design having been forgotten in the heat of the moment. It covered his entire back, the waves and wind around the dragon, twirling and dancing together as the giant mythical beast desperately tried to break through it all. Taking a few more deep breaths, Cloud looked away, unable to speak or do much of anything. Zack seemed just as content as Cloud was to lie and not move, not speak, or do anything, in fear of breaking the spell they had created.

Finally, the lower pain caused Cloud to shift. His inner thighs felt more wet then normal and when he shifted, Cloud knew something had torn.

Figured the one thing they had shared would end in blood.

* * *

**Authors Note:** Gah, I am SO sorry for this being out so late. It's the last month of school for me, and the last year in High School so I have graduation, school, extra activites outside of school and general crazy-ness. But here is the next chapter and I hope you enjoyed the sexy time. Yeah, Cloud and Zack are screwed over, and sex seemed like a good way to handle it xD This is when the shit really hits the fan. Anywho's, updates will be slow for a little while, so please bare with me! I love all of you for reading and commenting and generally enjoying it! My favorite thing to write was the Tattoo xD All Yakuza members have full back tattoo's, which it pretty awesome. Oh, and is anyone else going to Anime Expo?

* * *


	10. Chapter 10

_Warning__: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer__: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

**Authors Note: **This chapter is all of Zack's past, just so you know!

* * *

Rain came down softly on the blood soaked street, causing the blood to swirl and run down the cement gutters until falling into the dirty sewer grates. A few shouts off in the distance could be heard; but no one inside the dingy buildings had any concerns. After all, things like this happened all the time.

If anyone had been looking-really looking- they would have noticed a young teenager leaning against a brick wall in an alleyway a hand to his jaw, his breathing laboured and strained. Blood was pooling out of a wound on his jaw and the teen blinked back the water running down his face as he tried to gather his strength.

His other hand held on to a small blade; old and worn. Despite the fatigue and the injury to the male, it would have been impossible to grab the knife from his shaking hands. It was the one thing that he had still, the one item on him that might have just saved his life.

"That was so fucking stupid…" The teen whispered to himself as he wiped away the blood from his cheek, only to have more appear and slide down his neck.

Pushing himself off of the wall, he began to walk slowly towards the area of town he knew, where hopefully everyone else had gone to. He was expecting a few of the members not to show up, after all, they had taken off more then they could chew. He wasn't one for rival gang fights really, but he wasn't the leader, and despite having more brain cells then half of them combined, he wasn't to be listened to.

Continuing on his path, the male stumbled slightly and fell against a black, sleek car accidentally getting blood on it. Swearing, he desperately tried to wipe it clean. You did not want to mess with people in this area who had enough money to afford a car like this. Unfortunately for the teen, his luck had run out for the day as footsteps were heard.

Looking up quickly, a sharp intake of breath was taken as he gazed at the older man before him. Silver hair that came to the man's shoulders hung gracefully around his face while calculating green eyes peered at him from under an umbrella. The man was wearing an expensive suit and it was evident he didn't live here.

"What are you doing so close to my car?" A deep, commanding voice asked.

Standing straighter, the teen tried to appear tough and confident, despite the pain in his side and the cut on his jaw that was starting to sting.

"Just taking a walk and I stumbled," He stated, sliding the pocket knife into his back pocket slowly while his eyes never left the commanding and all together intimidating male before him.

A slow nod was received by the teen as the male inspected the small blood droplets on the car. "Hmm… get in an accident of any kind?"

Shaking his head quickly the teen attempted to make it look like he was okay. "Just fell on the street a few blocks down and cut myself. Look, I should be getting home… to my parents… sorry about your car." He stated as he hurried off down the street.

The silver haired man watched him for a moment before calling out. "What is your name?"

The teen stopped and turned around. "Why do you wanna know?"

"It's just a simple question out of curiosity. Feel free to give me your real name or the name your gang has given you,"

Eyes narrowed as the young man eyes the older male suspiciously. Deciding to go out on a limb he answered carefully but confidently.

"Zack… my names Zack. And yours?" Zack asked, expecting an answer.

The silver haired male simply smiled and pulled his umbrella down as the rain stopped. "How about I tell you when I know I can trust you?" And with that, he got into his car and drove away, leaving Zack irritated.

--XX--

For the next couple of weeks, life went normally for Zack. He woke up in the apartment he shared with his alcoholic father. The wallpaper on the walls was peeling off, cracks in the ceiling caused regular leaks, and the smell of old cat urine and cigarettes were evident. His mother had passed away when he was three, since then his father had fallen into a deep depression. Zack learnt quickly that life would be pretty shitty, but tried to keep optimistic. He stayed wary of most people, but once he got to know them, he opened up quickly and acted like he was a normal kid living in a normal environment.

His Dad loved Zack… sometimes. Most of the time he was too busy gambling and drinking to really pay attention. As a child he spent most of his time at his neighbour Yoko's. She was a kind old woman who had suffered from empty nest syndrome for a while, and was more than willing to look after the excitable child, if not restless. Yoko always commented on how Zack's mind was always racing a mile a minute, and how he was destined for greater things. She believed he had a soul of an artist, always praising him for the small carvings he made for her. She wanted him to go to an art school, but unfortunately, Zack would have never been able to gather the funds.

After she passed away was when Zack decided to join the gang he was currently in.

He joined when he was fourteen, finding it difficult to really survive in an area like this without some sort of 'brotherhood' to be tied to. Now, after five years in the gang, Zack found himself increasingly restless. There had been an increase in rival gang fights, and although Zack had never killed someone, he had come close a number of times, not to mention he had come close to being killed himself.

But ever since the day he met the mysterious male with the expensive suit and all knowing eyes, Zack had an uneasy feeling. Almost like someone was watching his every move.

He had figured the silver haired mystery was from an important family, one of the Yakuza members no doubt. It was every gang's dream to find themselves connected with the crime business that the Yakuza held in the palm of their hands. But it was difficult to really rise in a place like that. Sure, small time gang members could join and be used as expendable crewman, but to really be trusted and accepted… it took skill and a shit load of confidence.

After three weeks, and an increase in paranoia, Zack was approached by another male in a suit.

He was sitting on a ledge in what used to be a green space, but had been turned into another parking lot used to serve the many business men coming in and out of the downtown core. Smoking a cheap cigarette, he eyed what appeared to be an overly cocky and annoying teenager, who looked, if anything else, younger then him.

"That brand is shit, yo." the redhead commented as he got close enough to see the packet sticking out of Zack's backpack.

Zack glared at the teen and snuffed his smoke out. "Sorry, not every ones rich enough for their parents to buy 'em fancy brands and expensive suits."

The redhead made a 'tsk' type sound and stuffed his hands in his pockets. He struck what was supposed to be an intimidating pose, but the look was lost on Zack.

"You probably figured someone was watching you the last couple weeks," He began, locking eyes with Zack. "And that's one of the reasons why I think you should come with me, Zack"

Zack made a sound and slid off of the ledge, intending on using his height as an advantage.

"How do you know my name?" He asked quickly.

The redhead shrugged. "Let's just say someone _very_ important wants to meet with you."

--XX--

Zack went along with it all. He figured it was probably a trap, but at the moment he was up for a little excitement. He kept his distance from the teen and followed behind as they left the gritty, dirty area into a place filled with pachinko parlours, host clubs, and bright lights.

"You live around here?" Zack asked, winking at a scantily clad woman who had walked by.

The lanky teen nodded ahead of Zack and sighed. "Yup, been living here all my life. Although not in the best of places, yo…"

Zack nodded slowly and followed for a while longer until he arrived in front of one of the many parlours in the district. Being led through the skinny hallway that was covered with machines, clinking and blinking as dazed men with greed clouded eyes stared at the silver balls that dropped through the machine, Zack found himself increasingly interested by what was going on around him.

Stepping into a back room, he went up the narrow staircase until he came to a carefully polished, oak door. He tried not to look as a few men walked down the hallways, their eyes on him as he stood at the door of what was expected to be an important person's office.

Knocking twice the redhead shot Zack a cocky grin before opening the door. Walking in, Zack came face to face with the silver haired male he had seen on the streets a few weeks beforehand. He was sitting behind a large desk, a composed look on his face. The corner of his mouth quirked up in what could have been a smile… could have been.

"Come in and sit down, Zackary." He stated, motioning to the chair before him. Zack glared at the 'Zackary' comment, but moved to take a seat, looking around carefully for anything that could spell trouble.

"I'm sure you're wondering why Reno brought you here," He stated as soon as Zack sat down. His gaze flicked over to the red haired teen that was leaning casually against the wall. Well at least he knew one name now.

"Yeah, I think anyone would though." Zack stated, looking back at the older male. For some reason, Zack wanted to act a little nicer and sat up strait, rather then slouched in the chair.

The male nodded slowly and laced his elegant fingers together. "I believe you already know what sort of person I am, and what dealings I do," He began as he leaned back in his expensive leather chair.

"You're a Yakuza member, aren't you? Probably pretty high up guessing by your suit and all this… fancy stuff." Zack waved his hand around the room and felt like an idiot. 'Fancy stuff?'

Reno laughed in the corner and shook his head while the older male shot him a look. The laughter was toned down, and he continued.

"As you know, we have been watching you for the past few weeks. It will come as no surprise that Yakuza families often gain most of their members from gangs and alike despite our better judgement and our higher status from the regular criminal masses. But we also see potential in young people in gangs, such as yourself." Cool, green eyes flicked up to lock on with Zack's. "I am offering you an opportunity to join the family. Learn the ins and outs, and in supporting us, we will support you."

Zack stared back at the male before him, breathing easy despite his increased heart rate. Join the Yakuza… maybe become more then a random street thug. He would have more status and hopefully a better life. Nodding slowly, the corner of Zack's mouth slid up in a smirk.

"What do I have to do?"

--XX--

Zack learnt quickly that his Yakuza family came before anything else. He was at home less and less, and barely even saw his father. It wasn't such a concern for his Dad when he left home to stay in his own apartment. It was in a shabby area, and had one main room, and a small bathroom and kitchen. But it was his.

The 'father' of the Yakuza group he was in, he later learnt, was Sephiroth, the male who approached him that one fateful day. Their previous father passed away unexpectedly, leaving Sephiroth in charge. He was a calculating, intelligent male, and if Zack didn't think he would be shot for saying it, he would have said he was a robot.

"He's kind of intimidating. Like, if I say something wrong, will he shoot me?" Zack asked Reno as they wandered down the street towards another 'lesson'. Reno had taken the liberty to train the new recruit, and Zack had taken a liking to the overconfident and often cocky redhead.

"Hmm, probably not. He would get someone else to do it, like his lap dog, Vincent." Reno responded as he slid a cigarette out of his pocket. "He doesn't like to get his hands dirty."

Zack nodded slowly and rubbed his eyes. The past few weeks had been hard on his body, training with a gun almost every day sent shockwaves through his arms. It was fun though- to shoot and to have that power in his hands… it made Zack feel good.

Really good in fact.

Reno and a few other members were impressed with Zack's quick learning when it came to marksmanship. He aimed well and got the job done, shooting the targets effectively and with little hassle. It was a nice feeling to receive those compliments and to already be known for his sharp eye and quick hands.

"So… how are your parents takin' you being out of the house all the time?" Reno asked. Zack learnt something about Reno quickly; He hated silence.

"My mom's been dead for a while and my Dad's always in a drunken stupor, so he doesn't really notice… besides, I moved out a while ago," Zack said, yawning. "What about your parents?"

Reno scoffed slightly and flicked half finished smoke to the ground. "Never knew my Dad and my Mom's one of the whores at the house the family runs. Who knows, I could be an illegitimate son of one of the members! But I am going to get my mom out of that someday. Thats one of the reasons why I joined the Yakuza, to get more status and help her out." Reno grinned brightly, despite the heavy subject. "I joined when I was pretty young, due to my charisma and quick thinking!"

Zack laughed and shoved Reno gently. "Yeah yeah, sounds like you."

Reno winked and wrapped an arm around Zack's shoulder loosely. "Hmm, you're one of the only members I actually like. If we stick together, maybe we'll run the family soon enough and take this city and soon the whole underworld by storm." He waved his free hand in front as if to paint a scene before them. Zack smiled and laughed.

"Take the underworld by storm…" He liked the sounds of that.

--XX--

Zack's palms were sweaty and his breathing shaky and uneven. The new suit he wore chaffed at his skin and made Zack feel like he was being enclosed. Eyes flicked up at the top of the elevator, scanning the numbers as they increased.

40, 41, 42…45.

The door's made a crisp ting as they opened, bathing Zack in a warm glow as he stepped out into the hallway. Mirrors with mahogany frames lined the walls with a small table under each one, different roses in vases on the tabletops. Expensive carpet cascaded down the floors, making Zack slightly sick to stare at the patterns as he casually walked down the hallway.

The guns on his side felt heavy, like they were burning against his side, trying to dig their way in. They were a gift from Sephiroth, a symbol to represent his first official job… his first official hit.

He was told to take out a man by the name of 'Yasuo Sato', a higher up member of a large cooperation who had been deemed a threat to the family. He had to take out the man and anyone else in the room. There could be no witnesses.

Cameras were located at the front hallway and in different corners throughout the house. Shoot the cameras; take out the man, and leave. Simple enough… except Zack had never killed someone before.

Sephiroth and everyone else seemed to have complete faith in his ability. Zack loved the feeling of the gun in his hand, the power behind it. It was easy to shoot a target, one that didn't breath, didn't have flesh and blood and a mind of its own.

He went over all the possible things that could happen in his head. But it all came down to one thing… it was for the family. It was his loyalty on the line. Sephiroth had taken him in and was offering him a better life, and he needed that life. Needed something else other then being in a gang with no possible future. He had to do it.

Coming to the door, Zack looked at the whitewash finish and the gold leaves decorating the edges of the door. He was surprised by the place, not thinking such an apartment complex existed in Tokyo. It was certainly the most expensive place Zack had ever set foot in. Shaking his head, Zack tried to clear his mind and concentrate on the task at hand and not the door and the price of it. Taking a few deep breaths, Zack's hand closed around the handle, grounding himself on the cool feel of the metal.

Opening the door (which was thankfully open and not locked) Zack stepped in quickly while pulling out his gun in one swift motion. The familiar feel of the handle in his hand made Zack's mind race with the need to shoot. Nothing else mattered but the mission.

Shooting the first security camera, Zack stormed to the living room, where two people were sitting. Mr. Sato and his American wife, her long blond hair tied up in an elegant bun as she turned around, eyes wide.

Two shots were taken, the silencer on the end of the gun absorbing most of the sound. Both of their bodies went limp, the shock on their faces still evident. Zack's blood was pumping as he turned away, unable to look at the people he had killed. Go in and get out; that was the mission.

Until he saw her.

He froze; locking eyes with crystal blue as a little girl, no older then five, stood at the stairs. A teddy bear was clutched close to her chest as her blue eyes wide and full of panic, looked at Zack with such confusion and fear.

'_And under no circumstances will you leave any witnesses to the job… do you understand, Zackary?'_

Sephiroth's words slithered through Zack's mind as his heart thudded against his chest. His hand slowly raised the gun, the barrel pointing to the little girl before him as the third shot was fired.

--XX--

Zack sat in the meeting room, eyes downcast on the table as he fiddled with the hem of his suit jacket. All eyes and concerns were on him as he stayed rooted in his seat, unwilling to look up until Sephiroth entered the room.

Zack looked up quickly and took a few steady breaths. Sephiroth's eyebrows were furrowed and it was hard to read his face… until he smiled.

"Congratulations, Zackary." Sephiroth patted Zack on the back, and everyone else in the room smiled and a few clapped. "Your mission was a success, and I believe you will become a truly valued member of this humble family."

Zack coughed slightly and nodded, smiling just barely. He thought he should be more… excited about the occasion. But what he had to do to be accepted haunted him in his dreams.

"Your marksmanship is truly astounding and your ability to finish the job is highly valued. Thank you for your service." Zack stood up and bowed to his superior. Sitting back down, Zack let his eyes wander back to the table as Sephiroth went right into business.

Two hours later and Zack found himself up on the rooftop of the parlour, eyes closed as he breathed in the heavy air. Reno was walking around on the roof, talking about different things, his hands waving around enthusiastically.

"-And man, did you see his face? He actually seemed impressed with you! And it wasn't even a hidden impressed or a forced look of admiration. He really thought you did an amazing job! He's making talks of sticking you on these things more often!"

Reno grinned and sighed happily. "I knew you would make it, especially with my amazing help."

When he got no reply, Reno looked over at Zack. "Yo… dude… what's up?"

Zack didn't say anything and as Reno walked over, he realized the raven haired male was crying. Freezing, Reno scratched the back of his head and made an uncomfortable face.

"Shit man… do you have something… in your eye?"

Zack snapped and turned around quickly to look at Reno. "Of course I don't have something in my fucking eye! Why do you think I'm crying?"

When Reno just backed off, his eyes wide, Zack continued.

"I'm crying because I killed someone- no not someone- a lot of people. And do you know what the scary thing about it all is? It's not that their dead… no, it's that I could cut myself off and kill them without hesitation." He stormed towards Reno and grabbed his collar, pulling him close. "I had to kill a little girl, Reno. And I did it… I fucking shot her in the head…"

Reno just stood, rooted in place, his eyes locked with frantic violet as they bore into him, as if looking for the answers. Reno had never had to deal with this. He had grown up with death and crime and all of those things. Zack, although he had been in a gang, didn't really know the true meaning of loyalty and what it took to stay true to those who took you in.

"Dude… I know… but… but it gets easier, trust me."

Zack slumped slightly against Reno, his fists loosening around the male's shirt collar as he rested his head on his shoulder. "Don't you see? That's what terrifies me."

--XX--

Zack's worst nightmare became a reality over the years. Killing people became part of the job. He worked alongside horrible people whose only wish was for more money and not to be caught. His loyalties lay in his family, and to the people who took him in and taught him how to survive in a world that had no care for the human life.

Life moved on for him and that was all that mattered… until he stepped into the meeting room that fateful day and received the file with Cloud Strife's picture, crystal blue eyes staring back up at him.

* * *

**Authors Note:** Hokay! So this chapter is MUCH longer then my usual chapters because I wanted to make it up to you guys for a lack of updates. Truth be told, I had a lot of struggles with this chapter, but I hope it's okay! You get some insite into Zack's character and his past, and maybe see a little into why he suddenly stopped wanting to kill... because he never wanted to do it in the first place! And I hope the child death didn't disturb any of you! Love all of you so much for watching/reading/reviewing! Thanks you!


	11. Chapter 11

_Warning: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer__: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

* * *

_Frantic heavy breathing could be heard coming down the dark, dank hallway. Was it his own breathing that echoed off the hallway or someone else's? He couldn't be sure._

_Clawing frantically at the walls as a way to guide him, he slipped and stumbled on the cobble stone ground, sending him to the floor. His chin hit the ground, yet he felt no pain. Lying on the cool surface, Zack tried to get up before he heard a door open. Suddenly a bright light shot at him, blinding him for a moment. Blinking back the light, his eyes adjusted to see a familiar face before him. _

"_Hey, you're back… come on, the party just started." Reno smiled brightly as his head cocked to the side in a playful manner._

_Zack stood up shakily and took a few steps towards Reno. "What's going on-"_

_Reno didn't answer and just waved him closer. Zack followed and walked into the bright light and was met with smiling familiar faces all around. Sephiroth walked forward through the group of people, a smile gracing his usually cold features. _

"_Congratulations, Zackary. It seems you have finally proven yourself." He patted him on the shoulder and Zack's knees buckled under the force. _

"_Why are you doing this?" He asked, looking around the bright room with decorations adorning the walls. It was like a birthday party with colourful balloons taped to the wall, and rainbow coloured streamers on the ceiling. But despite the cheery colours, something felt off. _

"_Why, you deserve it!" Sephiroth smiled even brighter and Zack felt the tension in his bones lifting, despite the feeling that something bad was about to happen._

"_Come on, let's open your present!" Reno said, pulling Zack towards a table like an impatient child. "I wrapped it for you!"_

_Zack looked at the large, colourfully wrapped box and was pushed closer to it, despite wishing to be far away. Tentatively, he reached out to touch it only to shy away. Something definitely felt… wrong._

"_Why so hesitant?" Kadaj asked, leaning against a wall. Tseng nodded beside him, a look of curiosity on his face. _

"_You're… you're dead," Zack said, looking at Tseng with confusion. "You died three years ago…" Confusion bogged his mind, making it hard to think and remember. "… a rival group shot you."_

_He felt someone cuff the back of his head and turned to see Vincent glaring at him. "That's no way to treat a guest, Zackary!"_

_Tseng laughed, although it was hollow sounding. "Don't worry, I came back to see you open your present."_

_Zack nodded slowly like it was the most logical thing he had heard. Drawing his attention back to the box, Zack slowly pulled at one of the large, blue ribbons. Everyone crowded around him as the box slowly opened to reveal a scrap of cloth, covered in blood. _

_Silence cloaked the room before Sephiroth spoke. "It appears it got away…"_

_Reno let out an angry sound and the room erupted with yelling and accusing shouts from all around. Zack looked around in confusion before spotting a little girl standing near the door. No… not just any little girl._

_It was her. _

_Her bright blue eyes twinkled with mischief as she called him over quietly, a small smile playing at her lips. Zack pushed through his family, who were all still yelling, to get to her. As he neared she scampered off, indicating Zack should follow. _

_Running after her down the same dark hallway, he found himself unable to keep up despite being larger and faster. His limbs felt heavy, and the air thick, almost like he was running through water. After what seemed like hours chasing down the phantom, he finally came to a large door and stopped. The little girl was standing in front of it, pointing impatiently. No longer was she smiling. Instead her features were completely blank, just like a corpse_

_Zack slowly walked towards the door, looking at the crack of light visible from beneath it. Reaching out to the door, Zack's hands closed around the handle. After one last look around he noticed the little girl was gone, leaving him alone to face what was on the other side. _

_Taking a deep breath, Zack opened the door and saw nothing but darkness. Cool air rushed out at him and all was quiet before a scream and a gun shot was heard. Falling into his arms was Cloud, blood pooling from his mouth and eyes that bore deep into him, despite the light from them dimming fast. _

"_You did this…" He whispered as the air rushing around them stopped, trapping them in a dead, silent world._

Zack shot up out of the bed, his body covered in a cold sweat as he gasped for air. He sat there, trembling and shaking before running a hand through his hair slowly, tugging at the tangled locks. Looking around the unfamiliar bedroom, he realized he was still in Cloud's apartment. Casting his eyes down to the spot beside him, he noticed the blond was gone, and a note was left on the pillow flapping in the breeze that came through the open window.

Shaking his head as if to clear it from the strange nightmare he had just experienced, he reached out to the cold side of the bed and took the small piece of paper in his hands, surprised at how easily he moved after having just experienced a dream that seemed to limit him in every way.

'_Gone to work- make some coffee if you like and then leave._

_Cloud'_

Zack snorted slightly and crunched the note in his hand. The bastard went right back into the public eye! Getting out of the bed, Zack gathered all of his clothes and dressed quickly. He frowned when he noticed his shirt was ripped, but covered it carefully with his dress jacket.

He walked to the kitchen and decided that coffee would be a good idea before leaving the slight haven the apartment offered him. Nursing the strong coffee a few moments later, Zack glanced out the window, keeping a look out. No one was near by, and he didn't see anything suspicious. Maybe they were looking for him in other places?

Pouring more then half the coffee into the sink, Zack left Cloud's place and hurried back to his apartment, thinking of the few things he needed to pack before going into hiding.

XX

"You look horrible." Rude stated over his paperwork as Cloud walked in, his eyes blood-shot and his usually immaculate suit wrinkled and disorderly. Over the past few weeks, Rude had grown accustomed to seeing Cloud appear at work in a state of unrest, but today took the cake.

Cloud didn't reply to Rude's remark and simply collapsed on the chair in front of his desk. All that could be heard for a moment was the sound of the photocopier busy at work three doors down and the annoying laugh from one of the secretaries. Cloud busied himself by pinching the bridge of his nose before speaking.

"I fucked someone last night who was sent to kill me and now I don't know if I am still going to die or if my life was just saved. But in saving my life, the man who saved it might have just lost his." Cloud said with an air of casualty, as if what he was speaking about was a normal, everyday occurrence.

Rude slowly put his papers down and gazed at Cloud through his tinted glasses. "Are you sure that wasn't a movie you watched last night?" He finally replied.

Cloud sent him a level stare before looking away. "I think I might move to Iraq. I hear it's nice."

Rude was silent again, not knowing what to do. He sighed heavily before pushing away from his desk. Standing up he went to his filing cabinet and pulled out some papers and closed the cabinet quickly, trying to prevent the drawer from squeaking too much. Coming back to his desk, he pushed the papers towards Cloud.

Taking them, Cloud looked them over before raising an eyebrow. "Transfer papers… to New York?"

Rude nodded. "I don't know if the story you just told me was true or not, but either way you need to leave Tokyo. It's killing you and even people who don't know you very well can see that. I managed to get you a job in New York and I would suggest taking it… although it's your call. You have two weeks to come to a final decision."

Cloud was shaking slightly as Rude continued to speak. "Are you… are you serious?"

Rude nodded again and went back to his papers. "You should get back to work… and maybe sleep too."

Cloud nodded and stood up. He pocketed the papers and left Rude's office and continued to his own. Mumbling a hello to Yuffie, Cloud wandered into his office and collapsed on the couch.

New York; a chance to start a new life. It was damn tempting. Actually, it was more then tempting. Cloud knew it was a way out, and he wanted to take it. But something kept gnawing at him. Violet eyes kept coming to mind, and Cloud found it hard to think of anything else.

He could almost feel all of the raw emotions last night still, as if they were imprinted on his body, like twisting tattoo's, similar to the waves on the assassins back. Cloud realized he had only learned the males name a little while ago…

Rolling on to his back, he gazed up at the ceiling. Despite his better judgement and his need to move on, Cloud wanted to see him one last time. Standing up, Cloud went to his office window and stared out into the city.

XX

Pushing away from the window, Zack tore his gaze from the huge city and hurried through all of his clothes, throwing a few in his backpack along side other amenities he would need. In a separate bag, Zack carefully stored away a number of guns, hiding them carefully among underpants and a pillow.

He was going to leave the inner part of the city and head towards the docks. There he would find a small motel and set up base, hoping no one found him. He would try and leave Tokyo soon enough, but had to plan ahead a little more in hopes of keeping out of more trouble. He didn't want to think about Cloud anymore or worry about him. The blond had his chance and could do what he wanted with it now. He didn't care… he swore.

But then why did he keep thinking about the male. How he felt under him, the sounds he made and the looks he gave. Everything about his last night completely surrounded Zack, capturing and holding him close. Try as he might, he couldn't stop thinking about it.

Going over last night's scenario once again, Zack suddenly froze when he saw his door swing open. Without thinking, Zack grabbed his free gun and pointed it at the entrance.

Reno's hand suddenly shot up in a surrendering motion, as he looked at Zack, eyes wide. "What the hell, dude?"

Zack froze, not knowing what to do. Surely Reno knew what had happened last night; Kadaj wasn't someone to let gossip like that go. He was worse then a housewife when it came to stories to tell.

"Put the gun down… you're freaking me out, yo." Reno said as he walked into the room.

Zack lowered his gun carefully, eyes still locked on the red head. "What are you doing here?"

"Just came to see what's going on. Last night neither you nor Kadaj showed up and everyone thought maybe some bad shit went down," Reno said, concern in his eyes despite a small smile gracing his features. "You look fine though… where's the little annoying fucker?"

Zack shrugged, completely at a loss. He figured maybe Kadaj had been so embarrassed about getting punched in the face and then missing his targets while shooting at close range on his first mission like that, that he didn't want to show his face.

"Maybe he's just… wandering. I don't know. Anyways, I have to…go."

Reno raised an eyebrow and finally looked around the room to see the packed bags. "Hey… what's this all about?"

Zack shrugged and just continued to pack. Striding over, Reno grabbed his shoulder and forced Zack to look at him. Zack slowly turned his gaze from the gun lying on the bed, to stare at Reno.

"Dude, what the hell is going on? I have never seen you like this before." He said, going to hesitantly run a hand through Zack's spiky locks. It was oddly comforting, but Zack tried not to dwell on how much it soothed him.

"Look, things just didn't go well last night. I ended up… ended up punching Kadaj because he bothered me so much." He was telling half the truth. His eyes fell back down to the gun again.

Reno furrowed his eyebrows, but stayed close to Zack. Zack could feel the red heads breath against his mouth and his eyes snapped up to look at Reno's. Reno was smiling slightly, a twinkle in his eye.

"Is that all? Man, I can think of a few reasons as to why I think he deserves it… but come on. You're shaking like a leaf… lets just go back and talk to Seph about it all."

Reno's hand continued to run through Zack's hair, and Zack almost relaxed… almost. Until everything from last night came rushing back. Seeing Sephiroth was a very bad idea.

"Listen, I have to go-" He was cut off by Reno coming closer, their lips almost touching. Confusion and hesitation ran through both of them and Zack almost pulled away, but the desperation in Reno's eyes coupled with the familiarity and trust Zack held for Reno made him stay still.

"Calm down…" Reno said, his voice shaking from nerves. "Just come back with me and things will be okay…"

"It can't be…" Zack whispered, looking at Reno with pain in his eyes. Something in him told him to trust Reno. He was the only thing he had left. Taking a steady breath, he finally confessed what had been nagging at him.

"Things can't be okay… not after I slept with the target."

Reno froze, his eyes going wide as all of his muscles tensed. Pulling away quickly, he shoved Zack hard, causing the man to fall into his desk. His face twisted before Zack and he looked ready to murder. "What did you say?!"

Zack began to tremble, realizing what he just said. "I'm sorry, Reno! Please… please don't say anything! I was confused and it just happened, and I don't know what to do! Please don't say anything, you're my best friend… you're like my brother!"

Reno, if anything, grew even angrier. "Yeah… I'm just you're brother. You can go around fucking your enemy yet you won't even touch me."

His words were like venom coursing through Zack's body as he stood rooted to the ground.

"Not… not even touch you?" Zack asked, voice shaking as realization finally hit home. Reno wanted more then brotherly love and a possible on night stand, and Zack had been too god damn stupid to realize it even when he was about to be kissed. He felt like such a god damn idiot, but if he thought he was an idiot, what must Reno be feeling. If the pitiful look he was getting from Reno was anything to go by, the redhead felt much worse then he did, despite the empty ache in his chest.

"I wish you and Cloud the best of luck," Reno said, his voice losing its initial anger, now all that was left as a hurt and exposed Reno. Looking at Zack one last time, Reno shook his head and stumbled to the door. Ripping it open he took off down the hallway, tears springing to his eyes.

Zack ran after him and shouted down the hallway as loud as he could, his lungs feeling like they were going to burst. "Don't go! I need you to help me! YOU'RE ALL I HAVE LEFT!"

But his words went unheard as Reno turned the corner and jumped down the old, rotting steps.

XX

A forceful knock was heard at the door, and Sephiroth glanced up from the novel he was reading to see Reno come in, drenched from the rain outside.

"What is it?" Sephiroth asked while trying to read Reno's face. Reno clenched and unclenched his fists before looking Sephiroth strait in the eyes.

"I have something to tell you."

* * *

**Authors Note: **And the story continues… Not much to say, except next chapter will follow Cloud more (finally). Thanks for all the reviews, favourites, reads, and watches! Love all of you!


	12. Chapter 12

_Warning__: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer__: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

* * *

A small trickle of water could be heard in the otherwise silent room as Sephiroth filled a glass. Taking a few sips, he slowly leaned back in his chair and looked at the wall, eyes narrowed.

"May I ask what you're thinking of, sir?" Vincent asked, sitting across from Sephiroth, hands placed carefully on his lap.

Sephiroth hummed softly in reply before looking at Vincent with what would appear to be cool eyes. But Vincent had spent enough time working alongside Sephiroth to know he was fuming inside.

"I would like to send Zackary a message… he wont be staying at his apartment any longer… would you mind finding him for me and sending him a small token of my… appreciation to the trouble he has caused me, and to let him know I'll be seeing him soon?" Sephiroth asked, his voice well controlled before he went to chew on a piece of ice from his drink.

The loud crack of the ice shattering caused Vincent to shiver slightly, realizing just how high strung Sephiroth really was. "As you wish." He replied, keeping his voice void of any emotion.

Sephiroth calmly told Vincent what he wanted him to do, and Vincent left with a deep bow and a small smile playing on his lips.

Shutting the door softly, Vincent turned around to see Reno leaning against the wall across from him, head cocked to the side.

"Are you going to go see Zack?" He asked, voice weak and lacking the usual cockiness.

Vincent nodded before tying his hair back in a ponytail. "Yes, are you planning on trying to stop me?"

Reno shook his head before looking away. "Get one in for me… alright?"

XX

A few hours later, and using all of his sources and connections, Vincent was walking down a littered street, keeping his eyes open for the motel Zack was rumoured to be hiding out in. The smell of fish and salt floated towards him and he frowned, hating being near the docks.

Turning the corner, Vincent's eyes moved up to the flickering motel sign, and sighed. He thought Zack would be smart enough not to choose the first place everyone would look. He walked up to the motel, getting that familiar feeling inside him—his body tight and tense, ready for a fight. He hadn't been able to really display his hatred and anger towards the raven haired male. He had caused enough trouble, and Vincent was more then happy to pay the man back for it all.

Wine red eyes flicked over the door numbers before he came to the last one on the row. A few sharp knocks and a moment passed before Vincent sighed and kicked the door open with a loud bang. One good thing about this area was that no one questioned when there was some… violent incidents.

A smirk appeared on Vincent's thin lips as he gazed at Zack who had shot up from his chair. Vincent noticed Zack had heavy bags under his eyes, and his hair didn't have that healthy shine to it anymore.

Good. He deserved all of it.

Closing the door quietly, Vincent threw on a pair of leather gloves before walking towards Zack, as the younger male backed away.

Vincent rolled his eyes and rushed forward, grabbing Zack's neck and shoving him hard against the wall. Zack's eyes were wide, but the fire behind them was still there.

"Sephiroth wanted me to give you a message." Vincent hissed out before punching Zack hard in the stomach.

XX

Cloud walked into the bar, eyes downcast but head held high as he passed the bar and ignored Tifa's hellos. He finally lifted his eyes up and was immediately drawn towards a woman sitting at a table for two, her manicured fingers curled around a martini as she relaxed on the chair. Her blue eyes flicked up to lock with equally blue eyes, and a small smile occurred on pink lipstick covered lips. She looked exactly like the rich prom queen from the American movies, except for her older age.

Cloud loosened his tie slightly and walked forward to sit down across from the older woman. He looked down for a moment and noticed a small dog was placed in her purse, its big eyes looking up at him. Cloud glared and was tempted to kick it, but decided he should keep his temper under control.

"You're looking well, Cloud." The woman said, taking another sip of her drink before setting it gently down on the table.

"Thank you, mother. Glad to see you haven't yet drunk yourself to death." Cloud replied, his voice steady and calm.

Cloud's mother laughed softly and shook her head. "Hmm, I think I figured out why you like men; because you can't get any women with your soft, kind words."

Cloud's eyes narrowed before he stopped Tifa as she walked by. "Get me something hard, please."

Tifa nodded slowly and continued on her way, casting Cloud a curious look.

"So, what is it you wanted to talk to me about? Haven't heard from you for a while now, I thought you were too busy watching my sister's ever rising fame in the medical world." Cloud said, acting casual as he moved back in his chair, giving his mother a level stare.

She laughed and shook her head. "You never understood why we put so much into your sister. You were too busy-"

"What, being a child? Having fun in the backyard and trying to play with friends?" Cloud snapped out, eyes narrowing.

"You never had any friends, dear." She replied coldly before picking up her drink and downing the rest of it. As Tifa walked back to the bar to grab her orders, Cloud's mother snapped her fingers and pointed to her drink.

Tifa glared but dutifully went to get the woman's drink.

"Your sister is an amazing doctor, and worked hard for her title." She said, locking eyes with Cloud. "And you would do well to remember that."

Cloud kept his gaze hard on his mother before Tifa came back and placed their drinks on the table. She squeezed Cloud's shoulder as she walked by, trying to reassure him.

"What? And everything I've done means nothing?" Cloud asked, crossing his arms over his chest in a defensive matter.

"Oh no, dear. You became a very successful business man, your father and I were very proud… but of course you had to ruin it and come out as being gay. You know your father doesn't approve of that life style."

Cloud was very close to stomping on the dog in the bag now.

"Anyways, that's one of the reasons why I came to talk to you today." She said before taking her drink in one go. Cloud rolled his eyes and avoided his own drink.

"You mean you didn't just come here to insult and belittle me?" Cloud asked, faking shock.

"That tone doesn't suit you, dear." She snapped back quickly. "No, I came here to talk about that promotion to the states you received the other day."

Cloud was a little shocked that his mother knew that already, but also knew not to underestimate her ear for gossip.

"Yeah, what about it?"

"Well, your father and I think it would best for you to take it. It's a very high up position, and it will give our family a good name in the United States." She smiled, although the gesture never reached her eyes. "It would make us very proud… and you never know your father may speak to you again."

Cloud was shaking with anger, but mostly at himself. Somewhere in the back of his head, Cloud longed to still be accepted and praised by his family. Maybe… maybe if he took the spot his father would... he quickly squashed the feeling and shook his head. "Yeah, tell him to fuck off."

Cloud's mother pretended not to hear it and picked up her bag. She stroked her fluffy creature and fed it the olive from her drink before standing up. She slipped on her sunglasses, despite it being late at night, and started to walk away.

"Be a good son and pick up the bill." She said as she left.

Cloud sat at the table for a while longer before quickly downing his drink. Standing up he threw some bills on the table before leaving the bar with a nod to Tifa. He walked back to his car and sat down where his pocket proceeded to vibrate. Taking it out, he looked at the number on the front to see it was unfamiliar.

Sighing, he was about to turn it off, before something stopped him. Taking a look around, Cloud didn't see anything dangerous, so he locked his car doors and answered it.

"… hello?"

"Fuck… is this Cloud?" Cloud knew that voice, and his hand tightened around the phone.

"Y-yeah, its Cloud… you sound hurt." He mumbled, hearing the strain in Zack's voice.

"Understatement of… of the year." Zack gasped out on the other line. "Look… I-I need your… your help."

XX

Cloud found himself outside an old motel, the door slightly ajar. Taking a few deep breaths, Cloud slowly pushed the door open and gasped when he saw Zack on the floor, a cell phone lying in his limp hand. It was hard to see the extent of the damage in the dim light, but Zack was definitely hurt… badly.

* * *

**Authors Note: ** Sorry for the late update. I started a new job and things have been a little bit crazy! Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter, even though it was shorter then the previous ones. Thanks for reading, and reviewing! I am getting less reviews every chapter, but I do enjoy reading them when I receive them! I reply to every one, and if I don't then I was having a brain fart and I feel real bad about that!


	13. Chapter 13

_Warning__: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer__: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

**WARNING: This Chapter is NOT worksafe.**

* * *

He hurt all over.

He wanted to move but was afraid he was going to rip something open if he moved too fast. He was pretty sure he already had a dislocated shoulder, and maybe a broken rib or two. At least he was on a bed… wait, when did he get on the bed?

Cracking an eye open (God, even his eyelids hurt!) Zack looked around, trying to gauge his surroundings. All he remembered from last night was getting beaten into a pulp by a bastard with a vendetta and then calling… Cloud?

Looking over, he saw Cloud slouched in a chair, bags under his eyes as he stared at the floor, a bag of melted ice in one hand and a bottle of pills in the other. Zack wanted to say something witty, but it just came out as a pitiful moan.

Cloud's head suddenly snapped up and he looked at Zack, relief flooding into his eyes. A loud sigh carried through the stale air as Cloud got up and hurried to the bed.

"Fuck, you scared me you bastard! You've been out cold for almost two days!"

Zack squeezed his eyes shut and moaned again. He vaguely realized that Cloud had been scared about him being hurt, but any further thoughts were discarded when pain fluttered through him again. "T-that long?" He croaked out, his throat sore from limited use.

'Yeah, you fucker! God…" Cloud ran a hand through his hair and tugged at a few locks. "Here, you need more medication."

Zack heard a pill bottle being opened, and the crack from the cap of water being broken. He opened his eyes and watched as Cloud put the medicine on the table and moved to help Zack sit up.

"You broke a rib I think, and you're bruised all over. I cleaned some of your cuts-" Zack let out a few hisses as Cloud pushed him up against the pillows. "-but I need to change some of the dressings. Also, we need more ice."

Passing the bottle to Zack, Cloud helped him take some painkillers. The water was soothing going down his throat, but when it hit his stomach, Zack realized how hungry he was. "Food?"

"Yeah, I was going to go get some of that too… I haven't really eaten either. Think it's safe to… leave for a bit? I only went to the pharmacy to get you some stuff but you know… someone wants us both dead now so…" Cloud shrugged and looked down at the now half empty bottle.

"No it will be safe… just go to a small convenient store. D-don't take too long, but d-don't act suspicious… okay?"

Cloud nodded and hesitantly moved his hand to brush Zack's bangs from his face. He paused slightly before quickly standing up. "I'll be back…"

Zack coughed and then moaned softly. "Yeah, okay…"

Cloud was heading to the door when Zack's voice stopped him.

"Why… why did you come?"

Cloud bit his bottom lip before turning around. "Because you saved my life… I figured I would save yours."

Zack furrowed his eyebrows and raised a hand to do a shaky salute. "Thanks… and Cloud… no milk products, okay? I'm lactose intolerant."

Cloud nodded and smiled softly before quickly turning around. Walking out and down the street, Cloud breathed in the air, happy to be out for just a little bit. He spent the last two days sitting beside the bed, watching Zack's chest rise and fall just to make sure he was still alive.

Somewhere along the way, Cloud had grown accustomed to the raven haired hit man. He wasn't sure why he was terrified at the thought of losing the male, but when he saw him lying on the ground, broken and looking like he was run over by a truck, something in Cloud broke. He figured it was because, in a way, the man who was sent to kill him was now the one protecting him and that somewhere along the way they had become dependant on each other to survive.

Well wasn't that just dandy.

Cloud was getting more and more angry and confused just thinking about it and everything else that was going wrong, and finally kicked a pebble on the street violently before walking into the store. The florescent lights flickered, casting an eerie, almost dead light on everything. Walking past the cash, Cloud's gaze flicked up to the man behind the counter, half asleep over his porn magazine spread across the surface.

Walking to the back of the store to the coolers, Cloud decided to get a few drinks before buying some random snacks and things high in protein. Walking to the counter, he dumped the contents on the male's magazine before he gave him a pointed stare.

"Shit dude… fucking ruined the moment." The man grumbled out, standing up straighter to begin scanning the items slowly.

Cloud stood and fiddled with the change in his pocket, and stared at the man, hoping to speed him up. Finally he could pay and threw the money on the counter before taking his goods and walking back to the motel.

Getting back, he opened the door and walked in to see Zack staring at the ceiling. His eyes snapped to Cloud, and he smiled slightly.

"You're back…" He croaked out, his voice still sore.

Cloud nodded and brought the bag over to the bed. He shuffled through it and brought out a banana. "It's from a corner store with a guy who read dirty magazines in public… so it's not the best banana."

He peeled it and passed it to Zack, who began to eat the fruit slowly, still incredibly sore. He wondered if he would always feel like this.

Cloud opened up the diet coke and drank half of it in one go before rubbing his eyes. Zack saw the gesture and frowned.

"You should sleep." He whispered, finishing his banana. Cloud looked at Zack for a moment before standing up.

"You need more sleep too," He wandered over to the desk and began opening a few pill bottles while counting how many he had of each. He brought them back to Zack after he had the right amount, and gave him the water. "Take these and try and sleep. I'll clean your cuts and then I'll sleep too."

Zack nodded and took his pills before taking Cloud's wrist in his hand. "Why?"

"I said already… you saved mine, and I owe you." He replied curtly before going into the bathroom to grab some antiseptic.

XX

Zack woke up at some point in time; not knowing how much of the day had passed but was feeling a little better. He was still sore as hell, but at least he could move better. Turning his head, he looked over at Cloud who was curled up tightly on the other side of the bed as far away from Zack as possible, and still wearing the dress shirt and slacks he had been wearing for a while now. He wanted to try and comfort the male, but as soon as he realized he was reaching out to him, Zack pulled his hand back and closed his eyes.

Looking away, Zack stared up at the ceiling before deciding to get up and take a shower, and inspect the damage. He stood up slowly, and took a few deep breaths, working past the pain of the bruised ribs and sore chest, arms and legs.

He slowly and painstakingly made it to the bathroom, and leaned against the wall. Flicking the light on, Zack saw himself in the mirror and cringed. He had a split lip and a black eye that was turning yellow and purple, looking like a disease carrying across his face. He also had a new cut on his cheek and his entire chest was bruised and beaten. Well, at least his nose wasn't broken.

He managed to make it to the shower and turned it on, letting it get hot before stepping in. He hissed as the water hit his cuts, but worked through the pain and stripped off some of the bandages Cloud put on him while watching the dried blood swirl down the drain.

Cloud… that man confused Zack. One moment he would be throwing things at him, and screaming bloody murder, and then next… he seemed kind and almost a little shy and vulnerable, like he needed taking care of. Zack still couldn't figure out why Cloud had gone through such great lengths to keep him alive. After all, before Zack saved his life, he had been sent to kill him. And it also didn't explain why Cloud was going above the line of duty. Anyone else would have brought him to the bed, tended a few wounds and then gotten the hell out of there. Not stay to feed and nurse him carefully back to health.

He didn't understand it… but he wasn't going to reject the help. Without Cloud, Zack thought he probably would be dead. He would have to thank him later.

He stood under the water for longer than necessary before cleaning up as best he could. Getting out he wrapped a towel around his waist before stumbling out to the bedroom. Looking over at the bed, Zack saw Cloud sitting up, a furious look on his face.

"What?" Zack mumbled out, moving back to the bed. He didn't look at Cloud as he lay back down, hissing softly as his muscles rejected the hunched over motion.

"You fucking got up and left without saying anything!" Cloud hissed out, his nostrils flaring.

"H-hey… sorry I just needed a shower."

"I thought you… you were taken away!" Cloud moved to rest over Zack, his hands on either side of his head, fingers digging into the pillows. "I will not have you getting dragged off and dying after I… after I worked hard to help you!"

Zack looked up at Cloud and didn't say anything. There were so many other unsaid things between them that Zack was finding it hard to concentrate as well as breath. God he felt like a trapped animal, his eyes flicking over Cloud's trying to read his emotion. But it soon became impossible and so he did what he did best, and he gave in to animal instinct. Moving his head up, Zack crushed his lips against Cloud's; just as Cloud had come down to do the same thing.

It was the easy thing to do, and in the back of Zack's mind, it felt like the right thing to do. Just push past everything to go to an ending they would both be pleased with, and while in the process it would allow them to forget everything completely.

Their lips locked together in a messy kiss, and Zack pushed past the burning pain in his lip that made it feel like it was being split all over again. He brought a hand up to run through Cloud's hair before Cloud batted his hand away.

"Save your energy…" Cloud mumbled against Zack's lips, his hot breath brushing against sweat slicked lips. There eyes locked again for a moment, and Zack still couldn't read Cloud's emotions. Just as he was about to say something, Cloud moved back down and cupped Zack's face in his hands and kissed him again, this time being gentle-- something Zack hadn't felt in a while.

A few awkward, and hurried moments later, and Cloud was rocking on Zack, head tossed back in pleasure as he tried not to touch Zack's bruises (which was proving to be difficult) while also running his hands all along Zack's strong chest at the same time.

Zack lay on the mattress and thrust up as much as he could; while dimly aware that maybe having sex with bruised ribs wasn't such a smart idea. But the pleasure rushing through his veins was enough to demolish any doubts.

Heavy moans filled the room, as they moved together, creating a moment that would take them away for just a while- something that only they could share in. The ecstasy between them boiled over as they released everything, crying out.

Moments later, Zack found himself once again looking at Cloud's back from across the bed, with his rumpled dress shirt half off and his pants discarded on the floor.

"Are you… are you okay?" Cloud whispered after a tense silence. Despite having been with each other in the most intimate way not five minutes ago, they both seemed to have an emotional distance between them that even they couldn't begin to breech.

"Yeah… what about you?"

Cloud hesitated before nodding his head slowly. He then closed further around himself and wrapped his arms tightly around his knees in a slow, almost pained looking motion. It wasn't just a physical gesture; it was also a hidden emotional one, telling Zack he didn't want to talk anymore.

Zack couldn't blame him… they were both too fucked up.

XX

Zack woke up and felt a weight on the side of his bed. He expected Cloud to be sitting there, and opened his eyes only to be surprised by the sight of Sephiroth sitting on the side of the bed, playing with a cigarette. He didn't look at Zack, although he knew he was awake.

Moments of silence passed between them before Zack spoke.

"Where's Cloud?"

Sephiroth raised an eyebrow and stared at the wall across from him. "I have no idea… I am no longer concerned about him."

Zack rubbed his eyes and sat up more, while pulling the blankets up to hide his waist before trying to tame his wild hair. He then paused mid way, and wondered why he was still trying to impress Sephiroth. He dropped his hands and placed them in his lap and studied Sephiroth closely, even squinting his eyes to get a real good look. Sephiroth looked wary and… tired. Something he hadn't seen for a long time.

"Why are you-" He began, desperate for answers but was interrupted with an unaccustomed fury from the silver haired male.

"I think you know perfectly well I am here Zackary," Sephiroth replied quickly, his eyes flashing from the wall to look at Zack, while his voice carried to him like a slap to the face. "Do you really think I wouldn't come and speak with you after you leave and betray your entire family?"

Zack met Sephiroth's stare before bending under the intense gaze to look at the floor. "Just get it over with then and kill me. That's what you do, isn't it? You beat me and took away everything from me, so what's left? A bullet to the head?"

Sephiroth looked away slowly before standing up. "We didn't do this to you, you did this to yourself. You were a good person, Zackary… you were true to the family and proved your loyalty again and again… I trusted you."

Zack stiffened and held on to the blanket around him. Before he could even make a sound, Sephiroth continued.

"I thought you would do the family proud, and I put a great deal into you… but you failed me." He brought a thin hand up to adjust his tie, shaking just slightly. "You could have done greater things…"

He turned to look down at Zack, and Zack almost felt like he was back when he first joined and Sephiroth was proud of his accomplishments, proud of who he was, and what he could do. There was softness to Sephiroth's eyes that wasn't there before.

"I am giving you a second chance to come back."

Zack was taken aback, and subconsciously went to rub his finger, knowing just what he would have to do to get back in. Cutting one owns finger off was a true sign of how apologetic you were. It was barbaric act from way back when the Yakuza first formed, and was still used today. He has seen many a man lose his finger, just for a chance at redemption in the eyes of a crime boss.

"W-why?" Zack mumbled, looking up at Sephiroth.

Sephiroth just headed towards the door and straitened his suit jacket before opening the door. "… Remember something Zackary… the Yakuza use whatever and whoever they want to get what they want… and I am not done using you."

He then left the room, shutting the door softly with a small click, showing how well he could contain his true emotions. The soft dismissal was like a punch to the gut, a thousand times worse than anything Vincent had inflicted on him before.

Sephiroth wanted him back--that was for sure… but when it came down to it, his reasons were like any other Yakuza boss'. It was for the good of the family, and that was all that mattered. The family as a whole and how high up each member could bring them in the crime world.

Closing his eyes, Zack thought of his options. Go back to face the music, and have a shot at redemption in the eyes of the only people he every really connected with… or run away and try and start a new life, with no closure and no clue.

Zack stared at the door for a long while, numb to any emotion before screaming loudly- letting out a barbaric, animalistic sound. He felt like his throat was ripping apart, but that didn't matter.

All that mattered, as that for once in his life, Zack was no longer confident in his set path.

* * *

**Authors Note:** Okay, so updates are going to go down a lot, because I just started College and it's kinda stressful. But, I promise I will work as hard as I can to get these chapters out for you guys! I appreciate everyone who reads, watches, favourites and reviews! Seriously you guys are SO awesome that words cannot compare. Uh, I hope you enjoyed the chapter; it was hard to write mostly because it relied so heavily on a certain feeling and emotion. But anyways, thank you so much for everything!


	14. Chapter 14

_Warning__: Rated M for violence, swearing and graphic M/M relationships in later chapters_

_Disclaimer__: I do not own all of these lovely characters; I just borrow them once in a while._

* * *

Zack found himself facing the old door of his apartment, his small bag filled with clothes and a gun resting loosely in his hand. He noticed a few people had tried to break in while he was gone, and frowned when he saw damage to the door. Whoever tried it wasn't very good…

Taking the keys out of his pocket, Zack opened the door and walked in, kicking away a few articles of clothing that had been strewn half hazard across the scuffed up floorboards. He looked around the red painted walls, eyeing a few photos that were crooked before catching himself in the mirror in the bathroom. He frowned, hating how his bruises had turned yellow in colour with the occasional purple to add to the effect.

He dropped his bag down on his bed and flopped down beside it, causing the mattress to squeak and groan, protesting the added weight. He no longer had any need to run away… well, maybe he did, but Sephiroth seemed to want to keep Zack alive to 'use him'. So, in theory he should be safe to come back to his apartment with its familiar cracked ceiling and the window that wouldn't open.

Ever since Sephiroth had come to talk to Zack and Cloud had left, Zack had nothing but his own thoughts to keep him company. He figured he would either go crazy or find the answers to life.

So far crazy was winning.

He still couldn't decide on whether he should go back. Cut his pinkie off, beg for forgiveness and forget about Cloud, potential freedom, and everything else but the dealings of his family. It sounded easy enough for most people. He wouldn't be living in constant paranoia for one thing, not to mention he could go back to something familiar… someplace that seemed to actually want him.

But the chance at freedom… the ability to break free and _do_ something with his life was gnawing at Zack from the inside. Groaning, the raven haired male rolled on to his stomach, and then moved on to his back quickly, forgetting about his ribs. He lay still for what seemed like hours before getting up to get a glass of water.

Turning the tap while washing away the dust in a coffee mug, Zack faintly heard the lock on his door being opened, and the faint click as it opened with no resistance. He turned the water off and looked over his shoulder into the main room waiting to see who would come through the door.

"- and he could have fucking given me the key before hand, otherwise I wouldn't have had to-"

"Destroy the door and unsuccessfully get inside?"

Zack paused and put his glass down on the counter and turned around fully to see Kadaj and Reno coming into the apartment. Kadaj was holding the key and had an annoyed expression on his face as he looked at Reno.

"Sorry if I'm not master of breaking and entering like some people." He shot back, sounding like a teenaged girl. He rolled his eyes and then went to Zack's desk to start looking for things while Reno's gaze went to the bag on the bed, and then slowly upwards to Zack in the small kitchen.

"You know I fucking hate how he hides everything," Kadaj spat out as he continued to shuffle around and pull out drawers. He seemed oblivious to the fact that Zack was in the apartment. "God damn faggot can't even use a file folder or anything!"

Reno growled and smacked the back of Kadaj's head before roughly grabbing his jaw and forcing Kadaj to look at Zack in the kitchen.

"Fuck, let me go, fuck, shit!" Kadaj shoved Reno away roughly and stood up strait. He glared at Zack and straitened his suit. "Oh, it's you."

"Yeah, it's me." Zack said, coming out of the kitchen to stand across from them in the room. "Nice bruise."

Kadaj's bruise that Zack had given him had spread across his eye turning green and yellow, making it seem as if Kadaj had been infected with something. Cool green eyes narrowed as Kadaj stared Zack down.

"I could say the same about yours." Kadaj hissed back, a smirk on his face as he looked over Zack.

Reno continued to stay silent and stood with his hands at his sides as he just stared at Zack. For a moment, Zack and his eyes locked, and Zack thought he could see a brief hint of sympathy before it was quickly masked by well controlled disdain.

"So, where did you put all your files on past hits? Because Sephiroth needs them back before you know… you die or whatever." Kadaj said, going back to rifle though the drawers.

"I burn them you fucktard. You think I would leave something like that lying around for the cops to find?" Zack said, as his eyebrow rose slowly. He crossed his arms carefully over his chest in a defensive matter, and wouldn't let his eyes flick over to Reno even for a second.

"Well…" It was obvious Kadaj was trying to come up with something clever before Reno cut in.

"Sephiroth didn't really send us for that shit, Kadaj. God damn you're dense, yo. He sent us to see if Zack had come back."

Kadaj sighed and straitened up again and looked over at Reno through his bangs. "Fuck you."

Kadaj swearing a lot was a clear sign that he was trying to cover something up, whether that was a mission he had, or a fumble showing off his clear stupidity.

"So you're back I guess… good. Why are you back anyways?" Kadaj asked as Reno went back to his silent ways and wandered in the direction of the window.

"I don't know… Sephiroth came and talked with me after I got my ass kicked because you snitched on me." Zack said, glaring at Kadaj.

"Ha, you think I snitched?" Kadaj asked, pacing back and forth in the room. "God, no. You fucked up my face and… well fuck, I didn't want anyone to see my face after what you did to it!" He actually looked embarrassed; something Zack had never seen the younger male feel.

Zack paused, eyebrows furrowed. But if Kadaj hadn't said anything, then…

"I did." Reno said, finally talking to Zack directly. Their eyes locked at that moment, and any sympathy that Zack had thought he'd seen in Reno's eyes before was gone completely.

"You… you did?" He asked, voice cracking as he did so. No… no, he knew Reno was pissed but… but this? As if to show his discomfort, Zack backed up slightly, shaking his head. "No, you couldn't have. W-we're friends still… r-right?"

Reno snorted softly and sneered at Zack. "If that's what you want to think, then go ahead and live in your lies."

Kadaj leaned against the desk and smiled, clearly amused by what was taking place in front of him. He tilted his head to the side, as if waiting to see who would make the next move.

"You're so fucking… trusting and gullible, you know that?" Reno spat out as his fists clenched and unclenched. "You should just go back to your blond whore and forget about us, alright?"

For the most part, Zack was ready to back down, but the sound of Reno calling Cloud a whore made the blood in Zack come to a boil.

"What did you just say? Did you just call me a gullible whore fucker? If you hadn't forgotten, your mom was whore and you probably came from the union of a slut and a whore fucker!" Zack was breathing heavily while his mind raced.

Reno just stood there, not saying anything again, but he too looked ready to burst. His hand twitched slightly upwards, and Zack caught site of the gun resting on his side. If it hadn't been for Kadaj pulling out his own gun quickly to point at Reno, Zack would have thought Reno would actually pull his out.

"Now now, Reno…" Kadaj said his voice low and condescending as he held the gun strong and steady at Reno's temple. "Sephiroth doesn't want any violence."

Zack continued to look at Reno, and Reno continued to look at Zack, neither of them taking a chance to look at Kadaj.

"Hey… Kadaj. Tell Sephiroth I'm coming back," Zack said quietly, staring Reno down. "Tell him I'm coming back and I'm ready to take back whatever I lost before."

Kadaj smirked and withdrew his gun slowly, sliding it back into its holster. "Good to know… now come on Reno."

Reno let out a huff of air before turning around to take off out of the room. Kadaj watched him go before looking at Zack.

"Hang in there… and see you around." He winked and left as well, shutting the door softly.

Zack stood rooted on the spot for a while until he sat down heavily on his bed, all the adrenaline gone for the moment, leaving him weak and shaking.

He was going to prove to Sephiroth, Vincent, Kadaj… even Reno, who was really in control of things.

XX

Cloud swirled the clear liquid around in his coffee mug as he looked out at the city from his office. Yuffie had brewed him some cold medicine tea, hoping to make him feel better, but Cloud hadn't even taken a sip.

He didn't have a cold, or if he did that was one thing to add to his problems. No, ever since he had come back from the motel his mind had been racing about what to do, and what all of these emotions running through him meant.

He had left the motel shortly after Zack fell asleep, not wanting to stay there any longer. He found the entire environment and situation suffocating. He couldn't explain his actions at all, but he could explain his attraction to the dark haired assassin.

He was everything Cloud wished he could be. He had that freedom to tell the world to go fuck themselves, and do what he wanted. He was… brave. He wasn't afraid to go against everything with the chance to gain something, but an even larger chance of losing everything.

Cloud knew he was too cowardly to do any of that.

Cloud continued to swirl the mug, thinking of all the opportunities he had been handed over the years that he refused to take because of one reason or another. But now… now he had an offer that he could take… not because of his parents or wanting to run away. No, he could take it and run with it. Go to the United States and do what _he_ wanted to do.

It was an appealing thought, and it was one that made Cloud smile softly. He could stop thinking about it like it was a chore, or something that his parents wanted him to do, and start thinking about it like it was something good for him.

"Why the smile?" Yuffie asked, walking in to look at Cloud's mug. All of its contents were still in it.

"Just thinking…" Cloud whispered, still looking out the window.

Yuffie crossed her arms over her chest and huffed. "Awe, not gonna tell me about it? Oh… is it a new boyfriend?"

Flashes of deep purple eyes skirted across Cloud's mind, making him look up at Yuffie quickly. "It's nothing important. Just… happy for a change."

Yuffie raised an eyebrow and nodded slowly. "Well that's certainly… odd. Did you take any medication while I was gone?"

Cloud shook his head. "No, it's nothing. I have to go speak with Rude." He stood up and left the cooling mug on his desk as he headed to Rude's office, leaving Yuffie to wonder what had made Cloud smile for a change.

Knocking on the large oak door, Cloud fiddled with his tie before walking in when a deep voice answered his knock. He was nervous, but he was also intent on what he was about to do. Cloud was going to take control of his life, once and for all.

Looking up, Rude pushed his sunglasses down slightly to look Cloud over, a little surprised to see his clothes ironed and in usual order.

"What can I-?" Rude was cut off by Cloud, his voice a little lighter than it had been for weeks.

"I'm going to take the offer to go to America."

XX

Smoke slowly coiled out of Zack's lips as he gazed out at the ocean, arms resting casually on the bars meant to prevent midnight drunks and smaller children from going over. The wind blew across his face, bringing him the sharp smell of salt, fish and pollution.

Another puff was taken while footsteps were heard approaching from behind, only stopping when they were a few feet behind from Zack. A smirk appeared on Zack's lips as he flicked the half finished smoke into the ocean.

"Didn't think you would actually show." He said, still looking out at the ocean.

Footsteps could be heard again as the person approached the railing. Zack saw Cloud out of the corner of his eye and watched as the blond male rested against the bars mimicking Zack.

"I always show up for my appointments." He replied softly as he too gazed out at the ocean.

They stood in silence for a while, just enjoying the moment before Zack spoke up.

"I'm going back to the Yakuza."

"And I'm going to the United States."

Silence overcame them again, only broken by the sound of a freight ship blowing its horn off in the distance, complete with the screech of a bird.

"Be careful." Zack said, looking over at the blonde. He met Cloud's gaze and tried to read his expression.

"You too." Cloud replied softly, continuing to look at Zack. A small line appeared between his eyebrows as he slowly moved forward to kiss Zack softly.

Zack kissed Cloud back, their minds just trailing off to enjoy the kiss for what it was. When they broke, Cloud's eyes opened slowly to see Zack had turned towards the city, eyes closed.

"I'm not expecting to live long but… if I make it through what I'm going to do, I'll visit you some time in America."

Cloud nodded and looked the opposite way towards the ocean. "I'm counting on it."

* * *

**Authors Note: **Bad news, guys. **I am going to Egypt for two weeks come November 4th**. So that means no updates until after I come back (around the 19th). Buuut, I also have College work to catch up on… and yeah… So I am going to try REALLY hard to get the next chapter out for you guys, but it could take a while! Please bare with me! Secondly, I didn't get many reviews for the latest chapter, and I don't write for reviews but I would like to know if I'm doing something right, or wrong! Feedback is always good, so if you get a chance, a review would be wonderful! Anyways, thank you for reading, watching, favouriting and reviewing!


	15. Chapter 15

_Disclaimer: I do not own FFVII or any of it's spin-offs!_

_Warning: Adult situations and course language_

* * *

_  
_

His chest felt like it was about to burst open as he let out another shaky breath, his breathing laboured and strenuous to his already thin and frail body. Taking a few calming breaths, he tried to regain what control he had or risk increasing the feeling that his ribs would rip apart.

The process was slow, but with a few more breaths taken and a steady way of thinking, the heavy breathing had stopped and with it so had the tears. It took even longer for his blood shot eyes to lift their gaze from his own hands, covered in thin blue veins and pale white skin, to his reflection that would be staring at him from the mirror.

Green eyes that used to be filled with certain vibrancy slowly rose to lock on to a pair of dull eyes staring back at him from the mirror. He looked dead.

Reno carefully examined himself in the mirror with little or no emotion. His face was streaked with hot tears that had started and hadn't stopped for what seemed like hours. His hair was dishevelled, thin strands coming out of the already messy ponytail to hang over his shoulder like small trickles of blood while his pale chest set off against the hair in a shocking way.

Looking away from the mirror, Reno stood up strait and grabbed a roll of toilet paper, ripping off a chunk to blow his nose with before he went off into his bedroom, collapsing on the bed.

"Fucking pathetic…" Reno whispered softly in the empty room. The lights were off, but the small din from the streetlights outside cast Reno in a zigzag light from the blinds that had been drawn.

Week three…

Three weeks ago, Zack got the mission that would change everyone's lives. Three weeks ago, Reno lost the remaining sanity he had left to the world.

Since then, Reno had been living as a dead man, walking and imitating what one person would perceive as a life. He did what Sephiroth told him to do, and when he had free time he drank, smoked and fucked away what time he had. Ever since Zack had left, everything seemed a little less worth living for.

Rolling over on the bed, Reno eyed the phone on his bedside table with disdain, knowing he would be getting a call soon enough from someone wanting some shit done. Everyone in the family had seen his downward spiral, but saw no way of stopping it. It's not like they cared much anyways. Maybe with Reno's current state of mind, he would pull off some shit that would get him killed and end up benefiting the family in some way. Maybe he would go postal and take out a few police officers before taking himself…

Reno hadn't realized how much life and passion Zack had brought into his life until he walked out completely. When he was with Zack, he felt like they could actually do something- anything- together. He felt a rush he never got from any drugs or hits, nothing. Just being with Zack gave him a sense of belonging… and now that was all ripped away.

Groaning softly, Reno rolled over to face the other side of the room, ignoring the neon glow from his alarm clock that stung his eyes. Beside the clock lay a rolled up joint, half smoked with the rest crushed in the ashtray. He had smoked half of it earlier to relax himself, only to end up a crying mess in the bathroom. He was finding it harder and harder to get his mind away from the _asshole_ that ruined him, what with every little thing-

"-reminding me of his fucking existence." Reno hissed out as he stared at the smoke, willing the memories to just disappear. But his mind refused to stay still, and his thoughts betrayed him…

"_It's not that bad!" _

"_Are you kidding me?! You can get addicted to that shit and end up a starved homeless guy out on the street, pandering for money to get your next fix! And then you'll lose your entire family and friends, and then die on the streets a nameless dirty man." _

"…_You're too creative, yo."_

"_Well I'm not taking it… and I paint pretty pictures so maybe I am creative."_

Zack never did end up taking the drugs. He stayed clean the entire time Reno knew him, preferring to smoke rather than anything else. He even opted to stay away from hard liquor. Reno always admired him for it, but also resented the fact that Zack could do everything Reno struggled to.

He was always stronger, Zack. He stayed away from unneeded trouble, kept his head above water, and managed to keep his moral values in a fucked up and chaotic world. Reno resented him for it. Always acting-

"-Fucking higher than me… keeping his emotions in check in tough situations while I break down and cry in a fucking bathroom." Reno said, his voice cracking slightly.

He remembered when Zack was grazed by a bullet on a mission gone wrong. It was just a flesh wound, but the blood had come out in thick streams. Instead of Zack being the one to start shaking and go pale, it was Reno who began to freak out as the sight of Zack's blood came into vision.

Reno was fine with blood as long as it didn't belong to someone he cared for.

"_Just run, Reno! God damn it, I'm fine."_

"_But you're fucking b-bleeding, and oh god… it won't stop will it?"_

"_Fuck, Reno I'm going to kill you! Now help run so we can get out of here!!"_

"_Y-yeah, right… okay yeah, that sounds good."_

Reno ended up helping Zack only when Zack helped him through the entire thing, telling him where to go, who to call, where the car was parked. Zack came out alright in the end, but Reno's entire core was shaken.

Reno was the tough guy, the cool guy with the dyed red hair and the smoke always dangling from a set of blood soaked hands. He wasn't the guy to completely forget about everything he was taught when he saw something as minor as a flesh wound. But Zack had that effect on him. He had the ability to completely change Reno- to reshape and change him into something Reno hated.

If Zack hadn't walked into his life, if he hadn't joined the family and he hadn't befriended Reno, Reno knew he would have been happier. Knew that all of this shit-

"-would have never happened."

Reno squeezed his eyes shut as his stomach churned inside him, rejecting the medication he had taken earlier to ease the headache that was ripping his head apart. Standing up slowly, Reno let the pounding pain aid him in forgetting about Zack and everything that had gone wrong. He welcomed the pain.

Walking back to the bathroom he started the shower up, turning the squeaky faucet to the left to let warm- almost scalding- hot water pour down to hit the black tiles. Reno watched the water swirl down the drain for a while before stripping his clothes off to jump into the shower, wanting to wash away his previous mistakes.

As he stood under the spray, his back started to itch from the hot water relentlessly pounding his tender skin, no doubt causing the skin under his tattoo to redden. Reno let out another moan as the memories assaulted him once again.

It was five years ago when both he and Zack had both been given the okay to gain their tattoo's, officially making them part of the family as well as including them in the long line of Yakuza members throughout Japanese history.

The entire process was long, painful, and costly, but it was all part of the job. They also got to choose the design themselves, which left room for creativity.

"_A dragon?"_

"_Yeah… you don't like it? I mean, I thought dragons were pretty impressive."_

"_It's cool, yo. But why the water design around it?"_

"_It adds a certain… feeling about me. Like, the dragons' battling the waves, trying to break free… kinda like me. Always working against everything…"_

"_Yo, you okay, Zack? You went off into fuck who knows where land."_

"_Oh yeah, sorry about that. Anyways, you chose a tiger, right?"_

Reno rested his head against the tile wall as he turned the water down in temperature, feeling the painful sting of the warm water all over his body now. He closed his eyes and pictured the dragon tattoo in his mind, an image he wished he could trace his fingers over again and again.

He should have seen the signs, and he should have been able to stop it. Zack had never been happy in the family. He was always talking about greater things, hell; he even got Reno into some of the ideas.

"_America! That's where we should go. You know- the land of the free!"_

"_Fuck yah! Let's go to… New York! See the big Apple, yo. Eat all their greasy food and check out the club scene… fuck it must be amazin'!"_

"_And then go out to the countryside and enjoy the open air… rent a convertible and drive down the open roads."_

"_A red convertible!"_

"_Fuck no! A black one, because black kicks red's pansy ass anytime!"_

"We never did decide on the colour of the car..." Reno whispered as the water went from boiling hot to freezing cold in a matter of moments. His voice was muffled by the sound of water pouring down as his body shivered at the contact from the cold.

They always planned to go to the United States and see everything this famous country had to offer. Only they were tied to the family and weren't allowed to leave their duties, even for a day. But they continued to dream, that's all they really could do.

That was one of the reasons Reno fell for Zack. His inability to stay knocked down for long and his day dreaming, relaxed behaviour. When Reno fell for Zack, he fell hard.

Turning the water off, Reno stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around his waste before going into his bedroom to sit on the edge of the bed. He could remember that day crystal clear.

It was when Zack was just about to turn twenty-three and Reno had turned twenty-two. The two of them were sitting near the place where they had first met, years and years ago. They had been drinking previously, and Reno was pleasantly buzzed as they watched people from all walks of life go by. Zack was rambling on about something, his face completely animated with his hands flying about.

Reno let his eyes wander over to Zack for just a moment, and that's when it struck him. He looked so… alive. The streetlights caught the shimmer in his eyes, making him look even more bright and vibrant. He was a breath of fresh air in the dull, dirty and all together depressing life they were both forced to live in. Reno could bask in Zack's vibrancy for forever.

But it was then that it struck Reno that he was in _love_ with Zack. And not just the brotherly best friend kind of love. No, Reno wanted to be _with_ him in ways that he never wanted to be with someone before. He wanted the hand holding, the sweet caresses, and all of the loving things that he used to laugh at when approached by previous lovers to act out.

"Or maybe I wanted…" Reno began softly as he stared across at the white washed wall.

Maybe he wanted _to be him_.

Reno shook his head and as if to dispel the though… but it wouldn't go away.

Zack had it all. He had the passion, the good looks, the charming personality… he had it _all_. What did Reno have? A whore of a mother, little or no ability to go it alone, and a fucking silly little crush over another guy; he was _nothing_ like Zack.

"Shut the fuck up…" Reno hissed out, squeezing his eyes shut.

Reno was nothing in the family. He was simply Sephiroth's little messenger boy, only allowed to join the Yakuza because his mom was connected to one of their many brothels that ran in the city. But after Zack came around… well then, everything changed. Because of Zack, he could do more things, talk to more important people, see more things, and listen into more meetings…

But only because of Zack.

Zack came in to the group expecting it all, and eventually-

"Getting it all…he always got it all." Reno's voice lowered dangerously as he continued to stare at the wall, but not really see it.

Yes, Zack always got it all. He was Sephiroth's favourite next to Vincent. Always getting the important jobs, the ones that the family needed to have done properly or face a complete and utter collapse of the system. He was trusted with everything, and yet-

"He fucked us all over," Reno growled out as he stood up quickly. He picked up a pair of pants and tried to put them on, his hands fumbling on the belt clasp. "Give him one job with a pretty face and watch him crumble like a fucking… like a fuckin' dog!"

Cloud… Cloud just sauntered into their lives. But Zack fell for the blond and his fucked up life. Cloud was to the crashing waves, like Zack was to the dragon; both of them threatening to destroy each other, but never quite letting go.

It was pitiful. Cloud offered Zack nothing but pain and abandonment. What good had Cloud brought anyways? He made Zack _leave_ the family. Desert them even. Sure, Zack was unhappy before he left, but Cloud had been that last straw- the last thing to take him away completely.

And Reno resented him for it, because _he _wanted to be the one to take Zack way.

Zack took to Cloud, despite being complete strangers. And here Reno was, left in the dark and pitiful world all by himself; a crying mess in the bathroom when he wasn't out getting smashed and fucked out of his mind. Reno was nothing like Zack. He wasn't even worth a one night stand.

"Shut up!" Reno yelled, hitting a fist against the wall. "Just shut the fuck up! Zack… Zack _loved_ me…"

Loved you… but not anymore.

Collapsing against the wall, Reno broke down again. Hot angry tears streamed down across his face, making the tattoos on his cheeks turn glassy in appearance. What had their friendship really been? Reno eagerly chasing after Zack in a sorry attempt at what he thought was a normal relationship? While Zack knew all along what was happening, and used it to his advantage. Seeing how… how eager Reno was to follow him into the gates of hell and back?

And Reno realized he was still staying true to that. Because what he was in right now, truly was hell. It felt like Zack was dead already, and he was simply following in the males footsteps to an almost certain death. Much like how the great warrior Achilles followed Patroclus into the halls of the underworld, all because of a love harboured between the two.

Only Patroclus loved Achilles back. Zack… Zack just _used_ Reno.

"H-he didn't use me." Reno whimpered out while trying to calm himself down again. He was going insane… he was going bat shit insane and he knew it. And he needed everything to change. He needed to get away from these deadly thoughts which twirled around his mind, assaulting him with things he knew not to be true- but took them as they were. Because really, when you play in the underworld, you're bound to lose something. Reno just never thought he would lose everything.

But it needed to change. He needed to make a pact with the devil to get himself out. It was over and done with, he needed it to all just-

"_End_…" Reno whispered in the silent room, voice breaking.

He unclenched his palms, his body suddenly going completely relaxed as a feeling of relief crossed through his system as it occurred to him that he could end it all. He could change everything and make it how it should be…

He knew how to end it.

The sudden beeping of the phone caused Reno to slowly turn his head to look at the cell over on the table, the red light flashing. Carefully, as if nothing before had been going on in his thoughts, he stood up and walked across the room to pick the phone up, thin fingers wrapping around the cell before flipping it open to bring it carefully to his ear.

"Yo…"

Heavy breathing could be heard across the line, before a mumbled 'shit' was heard coming from a usually composed male. "Reno, it's Vincent. We have had a complete breech of security at two of our facilities. We need you to come down to the brothel on Kosu street."

"Right away… boss." Reno flipped the phone closed and put his shirt and jacket on, before tying his hair back into the usual ponytail. It was time to get on with the job.

**XX**

"After he killed our men in the building, he stepped out and used Molotov cocktails on the building, sending it up in flames in a matter of moments. Luckily we got it all on security cameras from across the street."

Vincent sighed heavily as both he and Reno stood in a puddle of water while looking at the shelled out remains of a building. The firefighters were clearing the area, and the lights from the trucks flashed against Vincent's jet black hair.

"What about the girls inside?" Reno asked, his eyes scanning over the scene.

"They were let out before hand… seemed like he wanted to save all the 'innocent' before destroying our property in a dangerous display of idiocy. He targeted the Pachinko parlour as well, but there was little damage."

Silence took its place between the two men as they watched the scene before them, both thinking the same thing. Finally, Vincent spoke again.

"Sephiroth had ordered us to find and to kill Zackary."

Reno didn't let any emotion read on his face as he watched the flashing lights spin around and around on the fire tuck. He took a slow breath before turning away from the scene to walk down the street towards main head quarters.

"It's time to end it all." Reno whispered his emotions dangerously cold and frozen.

* * *

**Authors Note: **I am SO SORRY! I said I would update when I got back from Egypt, but I have been back for over a month and still no update! But here it is, a new (very emo filled) chapter for you! I hope you enjoyed it, and hope you get some slight insight into Reno's behavior towards everything. I'll try and update more often, I just got caught up with a lot of stuff after my wonderful trip! Anyways, Happy New Years and I hope you all had a good Christmas!


	16. Chapter 16

_Disclaimer: I do not own FFVII or any of it's spin-offs!_

_Warning: Adult situations and course language_

_

* * *

_

'_Hello Mr. Jones. It is very nice to meet you.'_

'_It is very nice to meet you too, Mr. Tohachi. I look forward to our business adventures together.'_

"Bloody hell…" Cloud whispered as he walked over to a box and threw a pair of socks in with one hand while the other held open an 'English Etiquette and Customs' book. A conversation in English was being broadcast throughout his apartment as he packed his clothes and desperately tried to remember certain English customs. He knew English well enough, but the customs… damn. Groaning in frustration, Cloud threw the book on his bed and walked towards the kitchen, scratching the back of his head as he went over the public transit system in New York.

The flickering light from the TV cast everything in a blue glow, including Cloud as he walked through the living room, eyes downcast. If it hadn't been for the sudden flash of light on the Television, Cloud wouldn't have even turned to look at the mute system.

On the news, a story was being broadcast about a recent fire taking place in an incredibly familiar place…

Sitting down heavily on the couch that had been pushed to the side, Cloud grabbed the stereo and television remote, using both to turn one system down and the other up.

"- the owner of the establishment refused to be present for the camera, but has been quoted as stating that "It's an unfortunate turn of events, but we're lucky that no one was injured"."

The news broadcaster stood outside a still smouldering building in the gambling and host club section of Tokyo, a clipboard in hand and an umbrella in the other. She had a serious expression on her face as she read the latest news about how it was fortunate that only one other building had been damaged.

"- in what was described as a large explosion by one bystander leaves arson investigators with some clues in which to investigate."

The scene flashed to a dishevelled looking business man, glasses covered in raindrops as he peered at the camera. "Oh no, I saw it all," He started, arms flailing about, obviously already intoxicated. "I was walking by and suddenly, BOOM, an explosion went off! It was so bright and hot, like an explosion from the movies!"

"More on this story as it develops." The reporter stated after she was put back on the camera. The news suddenly changed to the weather report, forecasting more rain.

Running a hand through messy spikes, Cloud looked out the window, sighing heavily. That had to have been Zack who… no, no Zack wouldn't have been that stupid. Setting explosives on the Yakuza hideouts was suicide, plain and simple. There was no way Zack would survive after that.

Growling, Cloud stood up and continued to the kitchen to grab a glass of water, pissed off now. He shouldn't be thinking about Zack, the Yakuza, or anyone but himself and his business. Besides, he wasn't worried about Zack… no, he was worried about… fuck, he was worried about that fucking bastard.

Slamming a glass down on the counter, Cloud squeezed the clear container, coming increasingly close to smashing the glass with his own hand as his frustration mounted in his thoughts about Zack. A few weeks ago Cloud would have been damn happy to have let Zack just walk away and never think about him again. But now, for some unexplained reasons, Cloud couldn't stop thinking about the raven haired male.

The glass was starting to give when frantic knocking at Cloud's apartment door caused the blond to release the item quickly in surprise. Wheeling around on the spot, Cloud eyed the front door through the entrance of the kitchen, eyes narrowing. Who would be coming over at this time?

Walking towards the door, Cloud jumped as more knocks resonated through the wood of the door. He hesitantly reached for the doorknob, all of his instincts telling him to just walk away from the door and pretend he wasn't home, even though his television was still playing the news.

A few more knocks occurred before Cloud finally took a few deep breaths and opened the door as he straightened his back, bringing himself to his full height.

Again, baby blue eyes locked with piercing violet, only this time it was the man outside the apartment whose eyes were wide in fright.

"Z-Zack?" Cloud stammered out, not expecting this at all. In hindsight, he really should have.

"C-can I come in?" Zack asked, shaking at the doorway, black hair plastered down on the sides of his face with his suit stuck against his skin. Cloud looked down to see a small puddle forming at Zack's feet, increasing as the moments passed.

Nodding his head dumbly, Cloud stepped out of the way to allow Zack passage into his box filled apartment. Zack shuffled in and walked into the living room, looking around before heading to a window. Shutting all the blinds in the little apartment he eyed the streets suspiciously before turning to Cloud, watching the blond lock and bolt the door.

"I saw the news report…" Cloud said, turning around slowly to see Zack had stepped closer to Cloud. A cold chill seeped through Zack and across to Cloud, wrapping chilled fingers around Cloud's skin.

"I targeted two… but they wouldn't report on the second. No one wants to hear about an exploding whore house." Zack whispered, his voice steady despite the rest of his body shaking.

"Y-yeah, I guess not…" Cloud stared intently at one of the buttons on Zack's dress shirt, eyebrow furrowed in concentration. He took a few swallows, trying to gather his thoughts and emotions. They had said their goodbyes, and Zack shouldn't be here. They had no attachment to each other anymore. They never really did…

"I'm sorry I came here, but… but I had to… I mean I had no where else…" Zack looked down at his shoes, scratching the back of his head. He hadn't wanted to come to Cloud's, but as he ran down the streets of Tokyo, heart thudding in his chest as the blood rushed through his ears, he found himself chilled to the bone and a fire in his soul. He wanted to share that fire with someone, someone special.

That's how he found himself here. He couldn't explain it, it even sounded crazy in his head. Yeah, he had saved Cloud a few times, and yes, they screwed. But that wasn't enough to build anything remotely close to actual feelings… was it?

"N-no, it's okay, you just… surprised me," Cloud said looking up to see Zack was looking down, deep in thought. Well this was real progress between the two of them. They couldn't even meet eye to eye.

"You can sleep on the couch tonight, but tomorrow you have to leave. Not because I want you to, but… well I leave tomorrow." Cloud continued after Zack seemed unable to speak. There was a first for everything.

"T-thanks. Is it possible for me to use your shower?" Zack asked, finally looking up. They looked each other in the eyes this time and Cloud noticed some smudged ash on the brunettes face and a small gash across his jaw line. Cloud tentatively reached up to touch the cut, soft fingers brushing against stubble covered and hardened jaw. Zack flinched as Cloud stroked the cut, but didn't move away as Cloud's fingers moved slowly away from the mark up to his rain coated lips.

They stood there, a moment of wonder and confusion, mixed with longing, before Cloud pulled his hand back, coughing once.

"S-sorry, I'll go grab you a towel and some soap." He mumbled head downcast as he shuffled off to grab what he promised. Zack continued to stand in the middle of the living room creating a small puddle as he stared at the wall ahead of him. A rough, calloused hand reached up to trace the path Cloud had made with his fingers, hand shaking.

Zack was afraid. Not for his life, not for what he had done, and not for what his 'family' was going to do to him. No, he was afraid of what he had created between him and Cloud. He was afraid that he had actually made something… something he would never be able to enjoy because of his fucked up circumstances. Pulling his hand away, Zack saw crimson blood on his fingertips from the slash on his jaw.

"Here."

Zack jumped as he felt Cloud behind him. Whirling around, Zack watched as he fumbled with a fluffy white towel and a bar of lemon scented soap.

Cloud was about to pass the objects to Zack, but instead placed them on a glass side table. "Give me your jacket." He instructed, hand held out to Zack. He could at least try and dry his well made suit jacket if nothing else…

Zack shrugged the jacket off and passed it over, watching as the blonde's eyes traveled over his chest. Looking down at himself, Zack realized he had two guns resting at his sides.

"D-did you want me to-"

"No." Zack shot out quickly before sighing heavily. "No, I just… I'll take them in the bathroom with me. I promise not to shoot your tile walls."

He laughed nervously, trying to lighten the mood. Cloud eyed him suspiciously before nodding. Picking up the towel and soap, Zack nodded his appreciation before going for the bathroom in the bedroom.

Putting the jacket down on the couch, Cloud watched Zack leave, hands stuffed in his pockets as they tightened into fists. He wouldn't allow himself to touch Zack like he had just moments ago, so he tightened his hands and pushed them farther into his pockets, physically stopping himself. This road they were on was never meant to be travelled down.

Meanwhile Zack had shed his dirty, wet clothing and stepped into the almost scalding hot shower. He washed quickly and well, wanting to wipe away the dirt from the city, his crimes, sins, and his overwhelming emotions that he didn't quite understand. When he was done he stood in front of the mirror, hand slowly tracing the handle of one of his guns.

It seemed like hours to Cloud as he sat on his messy bed before a puff of steam escaped from the open bathroom door. Stepping out Zack had a towel wrapped around his waist, his guns and holster in his hands. He paused as he saw the blonde sitting on the bed.

"Oh… I'm done, but my clothes were still wet…" He mumbled, looking down at his practically nude form.

Cloud shrugged slightly and looked at Zack's sleek, black guns. "Are you ever going to put those down?"

"I… I don't want to, but I guess I have to some time, right?" Zack too looked down at his guns, knuckles white around the metal and leather of the holster. He forced himself to let go of the deathly grip he had on them, and looked around, lost as to what to do.

Cloud just stared at Zack, blue eyes roaming over the other man's features, before coming to a rest on the slash across his jaw, now noticing it overlapped another scar, making an X.

"Where did that scar come from?" Cloud asked, head cocked to the side as he looked at Zack.

Zack's eyebrows furrowed, a hand moving to gently trace the old wound, realizing where Cloud was looking. "Oh, this? It's… it's from a past life."

'_How about I tell you when I know I can trust you?'_

Sephiroth's deep voice bore into Zack's head, causing him to shake his head in a futile attempt to forget his first meeting with the man who would forever change his life.

"Are you okay?" Cloud asked his voice closer than before. Zack blinked a few times, noticing Cloud was standing close to him, concern in his eyes.

"Y-yeah, sorry… I'm just really tired." Zack said, trying to smile although no warmth showed in his eye. "Just really tired."

_Of everything_.

"Yeah, me too…" Cloud whispered looking at Zack with eyes filled with mixed emotions. "Tired like… like I just want to sleep forever, you know? So I don't have to think, or trouble myself… so I can just breathe and get away from it all… get away and have that peace, even for just a little while."

"Yeah…" Zack nodded his head, looking at Cloud carefully. "Just find peace."

Cloud's eyes never left Zack's as they the two of them drew closer together, almost touching but not quite.

"M-maybe… maybe we can find peace some day…" Cloud mumbled, licking his dry lips. "Maybe… together?"

"Maybe…" Zack whispered back before he moved forward to kiss Cloud. It was tentative and slow, both of them unsure of what to do. Cloud's hand came up to gently touch Zack's arm as Zack slowly relaxed his grip on his pistols, dropping to the ground with a dull thunk.

This was crazy and unwise, they both knew it. They should never have met again, not after they had walked away. Only Zack had come back. He came back and now all the emotions and feelings that had been snuffed out instantly burst into a flame that would not be extinguished, no matter how hard the two of them willed it to just die.

Pulling away only a little bit so they were still sharing the same breath, Zack went to cup Cloud's cheek with his blood stained hand. "Peace… if only for a moment."

Cloud nodded as he moved to kiss Zack again, still gentle and slow as if they were both new to it all. Hands wandered as they stepped back towards the bed. They weren't thinking about what they were doing and what they were about to do. All thought centered on how this felt so… right. It was a complicated issue, how they met and acted around each other, but it was their complicated issue.

Theirs and no one else's.

Zack's towel slid off and soon Cloud's clothes followed as their hands danced across skin, and cool sheets pressed against them, creating a space in which sensation and emotion went hand in hand.

Soft gasps filled the room as kisses were exchanged and sweat beads rolled across goose bump covered flesh. There was no hurry in any action; each kiss experienced, each thrust met in perfect harmony between two souls looking for that something that only those who truly want to live experience.

Pale hands, soft like gentle rain wandered down the spine of a fierce dragon, taming it into submission as the fierce beast allowed itself to be overcome by the chilling and calm water.

It wouldn't last, they both knew it. Nothing ever lasted, despite humans desperate attempts to keep hold of it all.

Their movements became hurried, breathes laboured as they came close to that perfection together. Their eyes locked in that moment as a sense of peace rushed through them, flooding both with desperately sought ecstasy.

As the patter of the rain hit the windowpane in the bedroom, one last kiss was shared in that perfect moment; one last kiss to chase away the demons. One last kiss to say all that could never be said in words.

One last kiss to seal the promise made.

* * *

**Authors Note:** SORRY! Life got in the way of me writing, and then when I did write it, I forgot to give it to my beta, and then she got caught up and… yeah. Anyways, here's the latest chapter! And we're down to the wire. TWO more chapters after this and my second fanfiction will come to a close. So stick by to see how it all ends, and to find out what this 'promise' is between our two star-crossed lovers! And again, thank you for all the reviews (although reviews went down last chapter. If you don't like the chapter, tell me! I need criticism as much as I need the positive remarks!), favourites, watches, and reads! Love you all!


	17. Chapter 17

_Disclaimer: I do not own FFVII or any of it's spin-offs!_

_Warning: Adult situations and course language_

**Authors Note: **Uh... sorry it took so long!

_

* * *

_"_Come with me"_

Paranoia, suffocation, pain, impending doom; these were all of the things Zack was feeling at the moment as he hurried down the wet street, dodging drunk men and young host club members as they tried to lure in their next customer. Shoulders hunched and head ducked, Zack was simply a shadow of his former self, no longer the proud Yakuza member he once was as he rushed to his apartment, desperate to get the fuck out of here. No doubt his apartment was being watched by other members desperate to catch him for what he had done last night.

"Watch where you're going, ass!" A young woman yelled at Zack as he accidently nudged her with his shoulder. Jumping slightly, Zack grabbed for his gun before pausing, shock marring his features.

"Sorry." He mumbled, hand dropping back into his pocket as he continued on his way, not glancing back. God he was paranoid, paranoid to the extent that he was willing to tear his gun out of its holster and point blank shoot the girl on the spot.

He really needed to get inside, grab his stuff and _leave_.

"_What do you mean?"_

Taking the steps two at a time, Zack hurried up to his apartment and stopped at the door, taking his gun out carefully as he placed a steady hand on the door handle, shoulder resting against the old door as he raised his gun, eyes looking down the hallway before opening the door, pushing his body in with his gun at the ready.

Scoping the main room, Zack kicked his door closed with a dull 'thud' and continued in, shoulders tensed as he moved to look in the bathroom. Pulling back the shower curtain, Zack finally relaxed when he saw no one was hiding behind it.

Placing his gun back in its proper place, Zack went back into his room and dropped to the floor beside the bed to grab a duffle bag that had just recently been put back in its place since the last time it was used in a previous runaway attempt. Tossing it on to the bed, Zack sat up and began shuffling around the room, tossing clothes, extra money, and hygiene products in it, caring little for how it was packed. As long as it fit, that's what counted.

Taking a few steady breaths, Zack stared down at his duffle bag for a few moments before tearing his gaze away and hurrying into the bathroom. Taking a moment to look at himself in the mirror, Zack scrutinized the healing cut on his chin before looking at his entire appearance.

Bags under his eyes, long and lank hair hanging over his usually cheerful features, his skin looked pale- almost sickly, and his eyes… god, they had lost that shine. He looked like a walking dead man.

"_Come with me to America."_

Zack felt a moment of pity for the man in the mirror before anger rushed forward, seizing him in a tight hold. Bringing his hands up, Zack began taking his earrings out and violently throwing them into the sink, the metal resounding with a small 'plink' in the porcelain basin. He didn't even give the earrings time to settle before he had ripped open the door to the medicine cabinet; grabbing a pair of scissors he slammed the door and began cutting his long, untamed hair.

Long black locks fell to the sink and on the floor as he continued to try and make himself different somehow- a new man for the final act in this play he seemed to get a starring role in. He didn't stop until his hair had come to just below his jaw, a length he hadn't had for a very long time. Looking at himself for a moment, Zack ran his hand slowly through the now shorter locks, feeling a little less tense. It was a small change, but it did wonders to calm Zack down just slightly. That was before he heard his door open.

"Feeling any better?"

Zack whipped around, hand scrambling for his gun as he dropped the scissors, slicing his palm open by accident. Blood dripped to the floor as he looked at Reno, gun pointed at the male.

"Get the fuck out…" Zack breathed out, his entire body tense.

"I don't think you're in any position to tell me what to do." Reno said, his stance its usual relaxed and arrogant way.

"Why is that?" Zack asked as he pulled back the safety back while blood dripped down the handle of the pistol and onto the floor.

"Because you are so fucked, no matter what you do, Zack…" Reno watched as the red puddle on the floor before locking eyes with the Judas of the 'family'. "So put the gun down, and talk with me for a bit… like old friends?"

"_Cloud… you know I can't."_

Zack didn't like the way Reno was acting, but lowered his weapon a fraction; in part due to the fact his hand was going numb from blood loss, and in part because he was curious about what Reno was going to say. "Yeah, talk about what?"

"Nothin' in particular… just talk about our lives… our futures. Like old times." He smiled and shrugged; a boyish gesture for such a tense situation.

"I'm not interested in talking." Zack said, despite the tight feeling in his chest telling him that this could be the last time he'd ever get to speak with his best friend. Lowering his gun all the way, Zack slid it back into its holster and walked out of the bathroom. Grabbing his duffle bag and swinging it over his shoulder he shoved past Reno and left the apartment, hopping down the steps.

He could hear Reno following him, his steps loud and thunderous to Zack's ears as he made his way down the old staircase. "You really are going to just leave?"

"Yes." Zack called back as he left the main lobby and headed down the street and into an alleyway.

"Hey, Zack, Zack, stop!" Reno called as he continued to follow a few paces behind. "Why you in such a hurry, eh? You're running like you have the Yakuza after you."

Zack rolled his eyes at the comment and continued on his way, desperate to just get away. "I'm meeting someone."

"Cloud?"

Hesitation- that was Zack's first mistake.

His second mistake was letting Reno stay behind him and out of his line of sight.

"_Yes you can. Just pack up what you need and leave. Get the fuck out of here and start a new life."_

'Click'

The deadly sound of a gun being cocked- a simple 'Click' and it was ready for the press of a finger to lay a bullet strait inside his head. How many times had Zack heard that sound, only to be on the other end?

"Don't… don't do this, Reno." Zack said, voice shaking slightly as he felt hard metal press against the back of his head.

"Why the fuck not?" Reno asked, teeth clenched together as he bit back a snarl. "Explain to me why I shouldn't just blow your brains out."

"Because I don't want you to have to live with the fact that you killed your best friend." Zack said, voice not even wavering.

Searing pain shot through his head as the barrel of Reno's gun connected with the side of his head, sending him forward as stars flashed before his eyes.

"You self righteous fuck!" Reno spat out as Zack grabbed at his head while turning around to look at Reno, pain marring his young features. "You have no fucking right to call yourself my 'best friend' and you have no fucking right-" Reno shot his pistol outwards again, aiming point blank at Zack's face "- to tell me how I'm going to live with myself."

"_But… where do you fit in this new life?"_

"Reno… just… just-"

"Just what, what exactly are going to say that could make this all better, huh?" He moved forward and took a swing, knocking the raven haired male down with a blow to the jaw. "That this was all just a faze? That you really didn't' mean anything by leaving the Yakuza, fucking your hit, and then destroying our friendship?! Because it seems to me like you meant everything you did- and you deserve to _pay_ for it all."

Zack struggled to stand up, body going weak on him as he shook under the pressure of having his best friend moments away from killing him. "Reno, just listen to me, please?"

"N-no, no you don't get to talk right now. I think I fucking deserve to speak now after keeping silent for so damn long," Reno was visibly shaking with anger, his eyes wide with fright and sorrow. "I mean, I was your best friend. I was the guy who was there with you all the time, the guy who listened to you and who worked alongside you! I would have done anything for you, Zack. Anything! We were supposed to take the world by storm and stay together. And then, then Cloud comes along and suddenly I don't matter. Suddenly, you think there is something better out there for you." He practically whimpered the last part out, his visibly shaking hand running through his messy red hair as his other hand continued to threaten Zack with his pistol.

"No, Reno… no you matter so much to me," Zack said, voice wavering with emotion. "Please, just put the gun down."

"If I mattered to you, you'd still be here with me. You would _love_ me like I love you!" Reno yelled out, voice breaking at the end as tears streamed down his face. "You would love me…"

As he spoke the last part he began to lower his gun, his resolve breaking slightly as he peered at Zack, eyes wide and mouth slightly open. Blood was running down the side of his head where he was struck, showing Reno exactly what he had done- and what further damage he could do.

"Reno, finish the job."

"_I-I don't know. But just come with me… to New York."_

As quickly as his resolve had broken, it had been built back up again as the smooth voice of Vincent carried over to him. Tightening his grip on the weapon, Reno took a few shaky breaths before speaking.

"Get the hell out of here, Vincent."

A small chuckled was heard before Vincent stepped forward to stand beside Reno, the epitome of calm. "You really think I would leave before seeing the fall of Zackary Fair?"

"Just leave, you stupid fuck," Reno growled out as Vincent tensed, eyes narrowing. "I'll get the job done."

"You were lowering your arm a moment ago, finishing the job seemed like it was the farthest from your mind. Now pull the trigger, Reno… shoot him and take him down. Think of how much he's hurt the family- how much he's taken away from _you_."

"Don't listen to him, Reno!" Zack winced slightly as another stab of pain shot through his head mixing with fear, sending Zack's heart beating a million miles a minute. He watched as Vincent calmly removed his own gun from his side holster and aimed it at him.

"Finish him or I will."

"Reno…" Their eyes locked for a moment, Zack feeling the hurt, humiliation and sorrow in Reno's while Reno saw the terror, pain, and sympathy in Zack's.

But mostly, Reno saw the man he loved.

"No." Reno whispered before there was a flash of movements and Zack had little time to react except to catch Reno as the sound of two shots went off.

"Fuck you, Vincent…" Reno whispered as blood began to dribble out of his mouth, body slumping further into Zack's embrace.

Zack looked down at the pavement where Vincent lay, eyes open and unseeing as the rain began to pelt down, carrying the crimson stream from Vincent's now lifeless body to the pool that was gathering at Zack and Reno's feet.

Zack tore his gaze away to carefully kneel down trying better support Reno as the dying man coughed out more blood.

"Y-you're so stupid." Zack whispered as tears welled up. He brought his free hand up and pressed down on the bullet wound on Reno's chest, desperately trying to stop the bleeding. "Do you want to die?"

Reno snorted, causing more blood to come up. "No… but this… was all fun… while it lasted"

"D-don't talk. Save your energy, okay? I'm going to get help, okay," Zack stuttered out, more tears escaping as he stared down at Reno whose eyes were now slowly closing. "H-hey, s-stay with me, Reno."

"I… took the bullet for… for you… 'cause I l-love yah… d-don't forget that, okay?" Reno struggled to get the words out, his body shaking slightly as the blood kept coming, staining Zack's skin.

"N-no, I won't. R-Reno… come on, open your eyes. Please, stay with me." Zack pleaded, his entire body shaking as he freely cried. "Reno… just stay with me…"

"…_Okay. Yeah, New York… make it big in New York with a new life."_

Zack was answered with silence.

It was deafening to Zack as he looked down at Reno's body, the life that once resided in it no longer there- gone to some other place- or simply gone all together.

"No… no Reno, don't go. Don't leave me, please. I-I can't- we were going to take the world by storm… please, Reno…" Zack let out a sob as Reno's hand dropped to his side, fingertips painted in the blood of Vincent's and his own.

Curling himself around Reno's body, Zack held him close, unable to let go. He knew the police would be coming soon after someone called in to report the sound of gunshots, but he couldn't leave Reno alone in the alleyway. He just couldn't…

"Why did you have to do that, Reno." He sobbed, the blood staining his jacket and shirt as he cradled the body of his fallen friend. Minutes passed with Zack rocking the lifeless body before he finally had the nerve to move. Getting caught now would be like spitting on the life Reno gave him.

Letting go of this tight hold, Zack gently rested Reno's body down on the ground before pulling his jacket off and making a small pillow to rest Reno's head upon. Shaking heavily, Zack tore at the skull cufflinks Reno had given him for his birthday just a few short weeks ago and placed them in his friend's palm. Wrapping Reno's fingers around the cufflinks, Zack let go and watched with pain as the fingers move away from the links into a more relaxed pose- further driving in the point that Reno wasn't there anymore.

"For payment to cross the river Styx…" He whispered before closing Reno's eyes and leaning down to kiss the male's forehead gently. "Keep looking out for me, okay?"

Standing up, Zack turned around quickly and took a few shaky steps before he grabbing his forgotten duffle bag and running down the alleyway, not looking back.

If he did, he was afraid he'd never leave.

Running down the street and into another alley, Zack cut through as many side streets so as not to dram attention. All the while the rain continued to pour, creating large puddles in which Zack ran strait through, water splashing upwards and around his foot- soaking him further to the bone.

He had to get far away, he had to keep running, and he had to get to Cloud's before it was too late. He had to keep moving, keep running and eventually he'd get there. Eventually he could find what he had been looking for.

He was just so close…

"Zackary…"

"_Let's meet outside my apartment tomorrow at sunset…. promise?"_

A smooth, calculating, and scrutinizing voice caused Zack to falter, his footing becoming uneven as he skidded to a halt.

Turning around, Zack's eyes met with his 'father'. Sephiroth stood at the end of the alleyway, an umbrella in one hand sheltering him from the rain while his other hand rested at his side, close to his weapon. An overwhelming sense of déjà vu washed over Zack as he stared at the man he had once trusted. If he could wash away the blood staining his hands and the past sorrows he'd endured, it almost felt like that fateful day when he first met Sephiroth.

"I think it's time you stopped running, Zackary." Sephiroth said, voice even and steady.

Squaring his shoulders, Zack took a few deep breaths and clenched his blood soaked hands into tight fists. Raising his chin, he stared Sephiroth down, letting all of his emotions translate into confidence, if only for a moment. He wouldn't let Sephiroth win, not this time.

"You've been running all your life, Zackary. From your family, your past, your duties, and your responsibilities… I think it's time you stopped running, don't you?"

Zack took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a moment, letting the memories of the life he was 'running' from wash over him. His first kiss, the hit he took all those years ago, the first time he rode a bike, the day his Dad took him to the zoo- completely sober… the overwhelming smell of Reno's cheap cigarettes, the feeling of Sephiroth's gaze over him, the touch of Cloud's smooth, untainted skin… all of it was but a step forward to a life. Not a thousand steps away from the one Sephiroth thought he was running away from.

Taking another deep breath, Zack let his eyes flash open and stared Sephiroth down one last time. "I don't think I've been running away my entire life, I think I've been running _to_ my life."

Sephiroth tensed for a moment, and for a split second Zack thought ht was going to make it- that Sephiroth would let him go, that he would see something and gain a semblance of humanity in his cold, Yakuza tainted soul- but that hope was to only last for a second.

Pain blossomed in Zack's chest as a cold and calculated bullet made its way into his chest, ripping through muscle and bone to rest itself deep within its victim. Crying out, Zack stumbled back and hit the wall before sliding down it, breathing already limited as the blood pooled in his lungs.

Heavy steps were heard before Sephiroth was crouching down before Zack, umbrella shielding the two from the rain as the older male placed his once smoking gun back into its holder.

"R-Reno… sacrificed himself… for me," Zack stuttered out as he stared Sephiroth down with all his might.

"Some sacrifices are in vain, Zackary. You should know this." Sephiroth replied, voice calm.

"Y-you bastard…" Zack muttered, his hearing overwhelmed by the sound of his own blood coursing through his dying system and the heavy patter of the raindrops as they hit the umbrella.

Sephiroth sighed softly and reached out to cup Zack's chin with his hand, the hand of a cold killer, and forced the dying man before him to look at him. "I _gave_ you your life, Zackary. I took you from the streets and I made you something- and you couldn't help but take it all for granted. You could have been something great- so great that this world I have created could have been yours. But you had to keep running for that life that you would _never_ get. There was nothing better for you, Zackary… nothing."

Letting go, Sephiroth stood up and moved away, letting the rain once again cover Zack. "So now, I'll take back that life I offered you."

Zack let out a weak moan and further slumped against the wall as his vision wavered and the cold crept upon him. Is this what Reno felt mere moments ago?

He watched as Sephiroth turned around and walked down the street, steps confident and steady as he left the man he murdered in cold blood to bleed out on the dirty alleyway cement.

"_Yeah, I promise."_

"M-my promise…" Zack whispered, vision fuzzy as he tried to stay conscious. "Cloud… my promise to…"

"Fuckin' hell…"

The click of male dress shoes.

The smell of expensive cologne.

The sound of cell phone buttons.

"I have… down the alley-…. Hurry he's bleeding bad-…"

The click of a phone being shut.

"You really fucked up this time… fuck, I don't know why I'm even helping you."

Zack managed to open his eyes enough to make out more silver hair and a dangling smoke before he blacked out completely.

**XX**

"Your flight is soon…"

"Yeah, I know."

"…"

"Just five more minutes. If he doesn't arrive in five minutes, then I'll get in the taxi and leave." Cloud explained, scanning the street up and down as Rude patiently stood beside him, hand resting on the blonds suitcase as they waited outside Cloud's old apartment, taking shelter from the rain under an awning.

"What makes you so sure he'll show up?" Rude asked after a few more minutes.

"Because he promised." Cloud replied.

* * *

**Authors Note:** Yeah, so this took me a really long time to get this out to you guys... like, a really long time. And I'm sorry for the wait, but if you take a look at my other writing, I think it's a little evident that I fell out of the FFVII fandom a while ago (for numerous reasons). Anyways, I know some of you might be upset with this 'ending' (although** there will be an epilouge** which will clear things up), but I have had this ending planned out since the beginning. Which is maybe why it took me so long to write it out. I must admit, I'm not 100% happy with it- but I don't think I ever will be. This chapter (or I guess the last chapter) will also be my official 'bowing out' of the FFVII fandom for good! I'll save the 'I love you all and thanks for the amazing support!' message for the last chapter, though ;) Anyways, hope you enjoyed and please review if you have time!


	18. Chapter 18

_Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters, setting, etc. They all belong to Square Enix and the United States of America_

_Warning: Swearing, Violence  
_

* * *

He stayed close to Zack as the sirens drew near- body crouched over as he watched the man struggle to survive. Blood continued to be slowly pumped out of a single bullet wound and he thought it odd how such a small item could completely destroy a life…

But he knew that it was close- too close at the moment. Zack was probably as good as dead, and why shouldn't he be? After what he had done…

But what exactly _had_ he done? Simply stood up for what he believed in- that's what. And that was a great deal more than he himself could account for.

The ambulance arrived first- lights flashing and sirens screaming through the alleyway, alerting the neighbourhood to the events that had taken place right beside their homes. Standing up, the young male backed up so he was out of the way as paramedics rushed towards Zack.

"Were you the one who called?" One of the medics asked as they crouched over and began to assess the fallen man. Moving him so he was lying down, they ripped open their bags and began to take out supplies- grim determination on their features.

"Yeah, I did," Cool green eyes watched the scene with slight worry- despite the male's better judgement. "I just found him lying here and…"

"He's lost a lot of blood, we're going to have to move him fast before he slips past us," one of the medics muttered before looking up at the caller for a split second. "Do you know him? Know his past medical history- if he's allergic to anything?"

The sound of police sirens could be heard drawing closer, and with them more questions would be asked- and more suspicion would be placed upon the slight male. Brushing wet, sliver hair out of his eyes, he licked his bottom lip before stepping back, glancing one last time at Zack's fallen figure. God, he looked dead already…

"No… well, I knew him once." The young male answered before stepping away completely, ignoring the cries from one of the medics to stay behind and answer questions- after all, the police were almost there.

Shrugging off the nagging feeling like he might still be able to help, he turned the corner at the opposite end of the alleyway and strode past Yazoo who had peeked around the corner to observe the scene that had gone from frantic to panic for the medics after Zack began to die on them.

Death was always easier to watch at a distance.

"Kadaj… why did you call for help?" Yazoo asked, tearing his gaze away to see Kadaj getting into the car they arrived in. Stopping mid way, Kadaj paused and sighed softly as he closed his eyes, trying to block out the sound of sirens and the image of Zack just _lying_ there.

"I guess because he stayed true to himself… loyal to the end- even if it wasn't to the family. You have to admire him for that." Kadaj said softly, making it difficult for Yazoo to catch admits the patter of rain and the arrival of the police not far off.

"Let's go." Kadaj said, this time louder as he sat himself down in the car seat and slammed the door. Yazoo followed suit and got in, driving away from the scene of the crime. Yazoo could see the headlines in the newspapers tomorrow; 'Three Yakuza Members Found Shot to Death- Good Riddance'.

Kadaj didn't know if he had saved Zack's life or not- he probably never would- but he might as well give Zack that one last push to the finish line… because if Zack didn't reach that freedom he so desperately wanted, what hope did he or anyone else in this harsh world have?

**XX**

_Two years later…_

Warm sunlight shone into the bedroom as a cool breeze that had traveled through a crack under the window caught white curtains, opening the room to the rays of the sun. Cloud lay on the bed, a warm smile gracing the lips of the blonde as his eyes wandered about the scene displayed out the window.

It was going to be a cold day- but it was welcomed. After all, Cloud had the day off thanks to a silly American holiday called Thanksgiving. He supposed he had a lot to be thankful for at the moment, but unfortunately the actual holiday itself was more about eating as much turkey as possible. Cloud was all up for copious amounts of food, but he preferred to spend the holiday thinking about how thankful he was to be at a place in his life where he was happy.

Truly and honestly _happy_.

It was a strange concept for him after spending years in a constantly foul mood, with pressures and constraints reigning supreme in his already fragile psyche. It didn't help that for a few months in there he was on the hit list of one of the most influential mob bosses in Japan, and had spent every waking hour thinking he would die at any moment.

But now he could just lie in his bed and enjoy the way the sheets felt cool and yet warm at the same time against his skin. How he could hear the honking from the cars down below, signalling a city bustling with life… and how he could enjoy a warm body pressed against his own.

The vibrating of his cell phone snapped Cloud out of his musings, and he sat up quickly to answer the call. The name 'Rude' flashing across the screen as a little phone icon danced about at the bottom, making Cloud roll his eyes. God, he hated that little phone icon.

"Hey…" Cloud answered, his voice low and heavy with sleep. "What time is there?"

"Late, but it doesn't matter. I'm just glad I caught you."

"Yeah, I get to sleep in today- spending my second American Thanksgiving in bed." Cloud laughed softly, relaxing slightly as he heard the familiar voice of Rude come through to him. He also had to admit it was nice to hear Japanese again.

"Well enjoy it- I have to work tomorrow." Rude replied as the sound of papers being shuffled around could be heard. "Anyways, I had something I wanted to discuss with you."

Cloud rolled his eyes and leaned against the headboard of his bed. Of course Rude was always strait to the business side of things- he never was good at small talk. "Discuss what?"

"About something in the news today- appears another war broke out between different Yakuza families."

Cloud's chest seized, breath catching in his throat as images of blood, bullets, and the voice of that man telling him about Zack flashed across his mind.

"Yeah, what… what happened?" Cloud asked softly, eyes looking out the window once again.

"There were a few causalities- and a lot of arrests which is a huge deal for the police, obviously. The leader of one of the families… he was shot. He went by the name of Sephiroth. He died from his injuries at the hospital later on. Strange though… he was shot by one of his own men." Rude mumbled as he skimmed over the news article again.

Cloud thought of Sephiroth- his strong and secure stance as he sat behind the mahogany desk in the back office of one of the Pachinko parlours, his long silver hair hanging gracefully over his shoulders as he read your fate out to you- your death sentence- as if he were discussing a simple business agreement. But that's what life was to Sephiroth, Cloud mused… a simple business agreement. Seems his agreement had finally caught up to him.

"It is strange that someone from his group killed him… did they say who?" Cloud asked, fiddling with the edge of his blanket.

"Mm, no they didn't say a name- just said he looked like he was related to Sephiroth in some way. They think it was a grab for power… either way, I thought you should know, seeing as how…" Rude trailed off at the end, voice showing his hesitancy to continue the subject.

"Yeah, thanks… I'll talk to you later, alright? You should go to bed soon." Cloud replied, running a hand through messy blonde hair.

Rude grunted softly and said his goodbyes, as Cloud pressed the 'end' button on his phone, officially ending the conversation. Letting out a puff of air, Cloud put his phone back down on the side table, mind slowly turning the information he was given around in his head. He wanted to know who killed Sephiroth- who finally decided they had had enough…

Maybe it was…

Shaking his head, Cloud crawled back under the covers of the bed and rolled over, thinking about how the Yakuza would always be the same- power hungry, consumed with fear, pain, and with an overwhelming urge to be someone… anyone. He was all too aware of how that could feel…

But he had managed to break away.

Sighing once again, Cloud rolled over to face the other side of the bed, a smile tugging at his lips as his gaze fell upon the man next to him.

Breathing deeply, Cloud's partner lay beside him, face buried in the pillows and arms wrapped under his chest, sleep still keeping a hold on him. Bringing a hand up and over, Cloud let his fingers wander down the males back softly as he once again tamed the dragon that danced with the waves.

There was no use dwelling on such matters- Cloud thought. Not when there was so much of this beautiful world to admire, too many emotions to seek out, and happiness to obtain.

Cloud had found freedom in this beautiful world, and he was glad that his dragon had too.

* * *

**Authors Note**: That's it, folk- the last chapter of this one rollercoaster of a fanfiction. I tell yah, this took a lot out of me over the past few years. I wanted everything to be perfect, and I think I achieved that… despite there being a few snags in regards to story narrative that I couldn't change. Oh well, such is life, right? But if you couldn't guess, I left the ending up for you guys to decide- but I am kinda pushing you guys towards a very obvious choice as to who is in the bed with Cloud. Let's just say I don't always write tragedy! Anyways, with the end of this story, so ends my FFVII fanfiction writing days. I mentioned in my last AN about how I was planning on 'leaving' the FFVII fanfic fandom- and I think it's now the time for that. I still love the game, and I adore the characters to pieces- especially Zack. Words cannot describe how much this community means to me, and how I honestly wouldn't be the person I am today if I hadn't begun to write Fanfiction. I wrote my first fic called _Sunday Afternoons_ for the FFVII fandom, and because of all the positive reviews and honest, heartfelt, support- I knew that I was good at writing, and that I could actually do something with my writing- whether that be making people laugh, cry, feel anger or sadness… all of those emotions and reactions are what make us humans, and I am glad I was able to bring out some of the humanity that this world desperately needs to you guys. I know that sounds pretentious, but I think the written world can help make this world a better place. Anyways, I would like to thank EVERYONE who has read my works, reviewed them, favorited them, and enjoyed them- you all mean SO much to me. From the bottom of my heart I want to thank you guys for changing my life- even if you didn't think you guys did. I can't properly convey how much you guys mean to me- but you guys mean a lot… like, a lot. Anyways, I'm not saying I won't ever write another FFVII fic, but for now, I'm just going to go off and leave the writing to the new FFVII generation. You guys do us old school ZackxCloud fans proud, you hear?

Love, Lemon


End file.
